Smokey's Corner - Entertainment

I love Smoke. I have to confess to it. Talented writer, photographer, reader, artist, all-around creative lunatic.

Here's a Smokey piece titled "Power Struggle With Chickens." It grew out of a conversation we had about chickens over tea and adda mara, one day. It came about as a result of my fervently praying for a change of power in this country. As I've mentioned, I'm an atheist. But, I said to Smoke, I'll pray, I'll even go to church, if this band of thugs, goons, looters, and all-out corrupt lowlifes goes to jail to the last man. Thus, the Monty Python skit at the end.

"Power struggle with chickens" ???? ... ya just never know what you're gonna get from me, do ya?

Here’s an excerpt from a book I’m “reading” right now ... book from the library on cd -- unabridged. The setting is Botswana. Contemporary times. It’s one of the No. 1 Ladies’ Detective Agency series: Tears of the Giraffe by Alexander McCall Smith. I think the author captures a lot of the thinking and attitudes of ... well, at least the people he met and knew in Botswana. He has certainly captured their humor. I recommend his books.

********

Mma Makutsi, Secretary of the No. 1 Ladies’ Detective Agency and cum laude graduate of the Botswana Secretarial College, sat at her desk, staring out through the open door. She preferred to leave the door open when there was nothing happening in the agency (which was most of the time), but it had its drawbacks, as the chickens would wander in and strut about as if they were in a henhouse. She did not like these chickens, for a number of very sound reasons. To begin with, there was something unprofessional about having chickens in a detective agency, and then, quite apart from that, the chickens themselves irritated her profoundly. It was always the same group of chickens: four hens and a dispirited and, she imagined, impotent rooster, who was kept on by the hens out of charity. The rooster was lame and had lost a large proportion of the feathers on one of his wings. He looked defeated, as if he were only too well aware of his loss of status, and he always walked several steps behind the hens themselves, like a royal consort relegated by protocol into a permanent second place.

The hens seemed equally irritated by Mma Makutsi’s presence. It was as if she, rather than they, were the intruder. By rights, this tiny building with its two small windows and its creaky door should be a henhouse, not a detective agency. If they outstared her, perhaps, she would go, and they would be left to perch on the chairs and make their nests in the filing cabinets. That is what the chickens wanted.

“Get out,” said Mma Makutsi, waving a folded-up newspaper at them. "No chickens here! Get out!”

The largest of the hens turned and glared at her, while the rooster merely looked shifty.

*******

Have you ever had a power struggle with chickens? I have. Folks, my life has been rich. Truly. I feel so fortunate. So many experiences.

My grandparents’ in Ireland had chickens (and turkeys) and it was my daily job to feed them, gather the freshly laid eggs, and, with a burlap sack, also gather the bricks of peat that were burned in the stove. I’m old folks. I remember those telephones that were on the wall ... that you see in movies ... where you crank it ... the cord goes to a separate ear piece:

Yes, I remember that type of phone. And, yes, my grandparents had a stove that you burned bricks of peat in for cooking. ‘member that scene in Monty Python’s movie ... I think it was The Meaning of Life ... and one of the characters calls Ireland the only Third World country in Europe?

Back to the chickens ... oh, I had many a power struggle in those days with those chickens! And ... ya know ... you’re a human ... so you think you’re gonna win ... but no. Ya don’t. Because humans have a tendency to get distracted by more interesting things ... but those damn chickens will keep their one brain cell tuned into that one thing they want to do ... and they’ll win every time while your back is turned.

And ... as a small bonus for reading my diversions and meanderings down this far ... a scene from The Meaning of Life:
Chaplain: Let us praise God. O Lord...
Congregation: O Lord...
Chaplain: ...Ooh, You are so big...
Congregation: ...ooh, You are so big...
Chaplain: ...So absolutely huge.
Congregation: ...So absolutely huge.
Chaplain: Gosh, we're all really impressed down here, I can tell You.
Congregation: Gosh, we're all really impressed down here, I can tell You.
Chaplain: Forgive us, O Lord, for this, our dreadful toadying, and...
Congregation: And barefaced flattery.
Chaplain: But You are so strong and, well, just so super.
Congregation: Fantastic.
Humphrey: Amen.
Congregation: Amen.

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Smokey's Corner

Smokey sent me this cool shot:



It was not submitted with the other photogs to the competition. I'm going to the gallery to see the exhibit next week sometime.

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Books Read in March

Well, this was a piss-poor showing. I guess I need an excuse factory for all the books I failed to read!

Excuse of the Month:

1. Pneumonia - delirious and uncomprehending for ~2 weeks; and
2. Gardening - the weather is beautiful and I have to get all the weeds gone before the annual fire inspections.

Books of the Month:

• A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius - Dave Eggers
  
  Borrowed? Yes. I blame Smokey.
  

  This book got rave reviews from many well-respected authors and reviewers. Mr. Eggers, when it comes time for you to review my work, I hope you'll develop the same convenient amnesia that appears to be plaguing the entire current administration. This book is very clever.
  
  Recommended? For readers who enjoy cleverness.
  Reread? No. I prefer books that either move me or teach me.
  
  

• The China Study - Thomas M. Campbell and Colin T. Campbell
  
  Borrowed? Yes. Thanks, Jay.
  

  This book has changed my life. The Campbells have put together an excellent and much-needed epic on nutrition and human disease. The epidemic of diseases that faces the 21st century human is very different from the previous century. Our worries center around obesity, diabetes, atherosclerosis, heart diseases, cancer. Diseases of affluence and longer lifespans. Except, according to Dr. Campbell, it ain't necessarily so. Why are the wealthiest not the healthiest? Don't we have all the science, the research, the necessary tools? Let Dr. Campbell tell you why. If this book doesn't change your life, I'll eat my hat. Or you'll eat yours, or something. It'd be better for you than that hamburger, in any event.
  
  
  Recommended? Highly.
  Reread? Yes, as soon as I notice any evidence of slackment.
  
  

• The Easy Way To Stop Smoking - Allen Carr
  
  Borrowed? No.
  

  Okay, what's with the self-helpalooza? I'll tell you what. It's time to quit smoking, once and for all. When your lungs feel like hot buttered knives are ripping through them with every breath it is time to stub out the last little stinker and say goodbye to that feeelthy habit. This is an excellent book. Really. The book can be repetitive at times, but repetition is needed when trying to get rid of an ancient and deeply ingrained - and life-destroying - habit.
  
  
  Recommended? To any smoker trying to quit. To families and friends of smokers who want to help their loved one kick the habit.
  Reread? Every time I need to.
  
  

• You Must Set Forth At Dawn - Wole Soyinka
  
  Borrowed? Smoke, again!
  
  

  What a wonderful book! It's so richly evocative of Africa, written with all the love that a person feels for their country and culture. It made me wish I was in Africa, it made me want to read a million books of African history and culture and language, and music, and art, and long for all Africana. It gave me hope. Africa can be the hope of the old world and the new world and the third world. It's funny, Jonathan Raban's book about Africana is the polar opposite of this, though well-written in its own way. Professor Soyinka has played a vital part in Nigeria's history, and is a writer of great talent and skill. I am glad he is still writing.
  
  
  Recommended? Oh, yes!
  Reread? Someday. After reading all the books on African history and culture.
  
  

• Women's Lip - TBD
  
  Borrowed? Gift
  
  

  An amusing little collection of feminist snark, which is going to feature on this blog sooner or later.
  
  Recommended? For amusement only.
  Reread? No.
  
  

• Pronatalism: The Myth of Mom & Apple Pie - Ellen Peck, Judith Senderowitz, Eds.
  
  Borrowed? Nope.
  
  

  This is an excellent collection of essays about the institutionalized pronatalism that has led the global population to increase by 50% over the last 40 years. Whatever happened to the ZPG movement? Forty years ago, governments concluded that the human population of the planet had grown too large and must be managed down to zero growth. Forty years later, we are seeing a vicious wave of pronatalism nearly unprecedented in previous history. Even as people endlessly whine about the rising cost of living, the pollution of the atmosphere, the water, the very earth, the crowded conditions of our cities, the lack of opportunities for young people entering schools and the workforce, we are breeding like cockroaches, with disastrous consequences, and no one is drawing the logical conclusion.
  
  Recommended? Highly. For anyone interested in women's studies, feminism, social studies, population studies, ecology, sustainability, and the fate of the world.
  Reread? As soon as ever I can.
  
  

I just noticed that four out of the six books I read this month were weighty and not a quick read. So there's that in my defense. I will stop beating myself up now and post an updated booklist to be read by July 1.

books

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Smoke's 2007 Book List

Complete List of Books to Read in 2007 - 2008
(no way can I read all this in one year ... unless I win superlotto)

• Seek the Fair Land - Walter Macken
  
• The Beatles - Bob Spitz
  
• Reading Like a Writer: A Guide for People Who Love Books and For Those Who Want to Write Them - Francine Prose
  
• The Fate of Elephants - Doug Chadwick
  
• Stella Adler - The Art of Acting: preface by Marlon Brando compiled and edited by Howard Kissel (Applause Acting Series) (Hardcover) - Howard Kissel, Stella Adler
  
• The Road Past Altamont - Gabriel Roy
  
• Writing Past Dark: Envy, Fear, Distractions, and Other Dilemmas in the Writer's Life - Bonnie Friedman
  
• James Joyce - Edna O'Brien
  
• Full Cupboard of Life - Alexander McCall Smith
  
• The Kalahari Typing School for Men - Alexander McCall Smith
  
• In the Company of Cheerful Ladies - Alexander McCall Smith
  
• The Tears of the Giraffe - Alexander McCall Smith
  
• The Innocent Man: Murder and Injustice in a Small Town - John Grisham(nonfiction)
  
• Meena: Heroine of Afghanistan - Melody Ermachild Chavis
  
• Fierce Attachments: A Memoir - Vivian Gornick (re-read)
  
• American Hollow - Rory Kennedy
  
• The Tree - John Fowles (text) and Frank Horvat (photographs)
  Continues my obsession with trees
  
• New York, New York : The City in Art and Literature [Hardcover] - Metropolitan Museum of Art
  
• Lucky Eyes and a High Heart: The Life of Maud Gonne - Nancy Cardozo
  
• Up in the Old Hotel - Joseph Mitchell
  
• Eamon DeValera - Tim Pat Coogan
  
• Charming Billy - Alice McDermott
  
• The Angel of Darkness - Caleb Carr
  
• Staying Connected to Your Teenager: How to Keep Them Talking to You and How to Hear What They're Really Saying - Michael Riera
  
• Gods and Heroes of the Celts - Marie-Louise Sjoestedt
  
• The Music Lesson - Katharine Weber
  
• The Romance of American Communism - Vivian Gornick
  
• Simple Living - Jose Hobday
  
• Writing a Novel - Dorothy Bryant
  
• The Art of the Novel - Milan Kundera
  
• How to Write a Damn Good Novel - James Frey
  
• The Echo Maker - Richard Powers
  
• The Art of Fiction: Notes on Craft for Young Writers
  
• Memoir of a Race Traitor - Mab Segrest
  
• Ireland: A Social, Cultural, and Literary History 1791 - 1891 - James H. Murphy
  
• A Leg to Stand On - Oliver Sachs
  
• R is for Richochet - Sue Grafton
  
• The Burglar on the Prowl - Lawrence Block
  
• Little Scarlet - Walter Mosley
  
• Cinnamon Kiss - Walter Mosley
  
• Like Sound Through Water: A Mother's Journey Through Auditory Processing Disorder - Karen J. Foli
  
• How the Irish Saved Civilization: The Untold Story of Ireland's Heroic Role from the Fall of Rome to the Rise of Medieval Europe - Thomas Cahill
  
• The Botany of Desire - Michael Pollan
  
• Purple Hibiscus - Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie
  
• Your Money or Your Life: Transforming Your Relationship With Money and Achieving Financial Independence - Joe Dominguez and Vicki Robin
  
• The Everything Guide to Writing a Novel - Joyce and Jim Lavene
  
• Rereadings: Seventeen Writers Revisit Books They Love - edited by Anne Fadiman
  
• A Book of Migrations: Some Passages in Ireland - Rebecca Solnit
  
• On Beauty - Zadie Smith
  
• The Healing - Gayle Jones [re-reading]
  
• The Empress of Ireland: A Chronicle of an Unusual Friendship - Christopher Robbins
  
• The Situation and the Story:The Art of Personal Narrative - Vivian Gornick
  
• Juno and the Paycock - Sean O'Casey
  
• Plough and Stars - Sean O'Casey
  
• Ireland: A Novel - Frank Delaney
  
• Catholic Girls: Stories, Poems, and Memoirs - Edited by Amber Coverdale Sumrall and Patrice Vecchione
  
• All Will Be Well: A Memoir - John McGahern
  
• Grace Notes - Bernard MacLaverty [re-read]
  
• Lamb - Bernard MacLaverty
  
• Cal - Bernard MacLaverty
  
• Tales from Bective Bridge - Mary Lavin
  
• Housekeeping - Marilynne Robinson [re-read]
  
• The Beauty Queen of Leenane and Other Plays - Martin McDonagh
  
• The Cripple of Inishmaan - Martin McDonagh
  
• Prisons We Choose to Live Inside - Doris Lessing
  
• Triptych and Iphegenia: Two Plays - Edna O'Brien
  
• Waterfront: A Journey Around Manhattan - Phillip Lopate
  
• The Irish: A Treasury of Art and Literature - Edited by Leslie Conron Carola
  
• The Illustrated History of New York - Ric Burns and James Sanders, with Lisa Ades
  
• The Transformation of Ireland - Diarmaid Ferriter
  
• The Story of the Irish Race - Seumas MacManus
  
• Twice Over Lightly: New York Then and Now - Helen Hayes and Anita Loos
  
• Crown of Empire: The Story of New York State - Paul Eldridge
  
• The Epic of New York City: A Narrative History - Edward Robb Ellis
  
• The Fifties - David Halberstam
  
• Working Class New York - Joshua B. Freeman
  
• The Illustrated History of Canada - edited by Craig Brown
  
• Ireland: A Social and Cultural History 1922 - 2002 - Terence Brown
  
• Wonderful Town: New York Stories from The New Yorker - edited by David Remnick
  
• We Too Are Drifting - Gale Wilhelm
  
• Boots of Leather, Slippers of Gold: The History of a Lesbian Community - Elizabeth Lapovsky Kennedy and Madeline D. Davis
  
• Odd Girls and Twilight Lovers: A History of Lesbian Life in Twentieth Century America - Lillian Faderman
  
• The New York Irish - Edited by Ronald H. Bayor and Timothy J. Meagher
  
• The New Art City: Manhattan at Mid-Century - Jed Perl
  
• The Princes of Ireland: The Dublin Saga - Edward Rutherford
  

Updated to format better.

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