History And Its Discontents

As y'all probably already know, if you're following this Cat's annual Book List & Review over at the sisterblog, we've been reading a lot of history over the past few years, and it has been extremely — extremely very — educational, indeed. We are shoved into schools, as children, not necessarily so much for the purposes of educating our eager young minds as to function as a sort of childcare-cum-penitentiary in which we are prepared for our future as obedient tools of the state. Learning to function in 50-minute segments, to slice-and-dice our attention into suitable spans, to absorb unquestioningly whatever the school system and our local school board shall deem it fit in their infinite lack of wisdom to shovel down our youthful throats.

No one questions this pablum, this feeding-tube of culture and knowledge that is piped directly into our veritable livers of learning, fattening us like those unfortunate foie-gras geese on things that mold our minds and early impressions, but travel under the radar, placing seeds in that fertile soil that are never questioned again.

Some of us are fortunate enough to be raised in homes that value education and the written word for its own benefits. But what about the hundreds of thousands of us who are lucky to complete twelve years of basic education, if that? Those individuals are wandering around with a worldview that is not even close to what those of us fortunate enough — or determined enough, or lucky enough — to educate ourselves further have developed.

Hell, even those of us who are educated better sometimes slip into the easy language of that early pablum. What have Americans been taught about the foundation of this country?

Tonight, PBS will be screening a documentary on General Custer, the stupid schmuck who has come down to us through the ages as the "hero" of "Custer's Last Stand." It's good to know that there are many white (and Black) Americans who have educated themselves on the true nature of this country's founding, and on the genocide of the Native tribes. But the local fishwrap carried a TV review column today by one Dave Weigand, who we must presume is an educated American. Educated sufficiently to find employ with the local fishwrap, in a time when nearly ten per cent of the nation's employable individuals are struggling to find employment. Here, for your enjoyment, are some gems from his recent review.

"After the war, Custer and his wife, Libbie, moved to Fort Riley, Kan., where Custer would head the 7th Cavalry as part of the government's effort to deal with the growing problem of Indians."

No, seriously. This is what passes for an educated reviewer's comment. What, exactly, does the writer mean by "the growing problem of Indians"? Were Indians suddenly becoming taller? Fatter? Experiencing a population explosion? The writer doesn't bother to explain what the term means. You, the reader, are left to figure it out for yourself, to ask your own questions, find out your own information, come to your own conclusions.

But this is a film/tv review, not a history examination or a job interview. We read movie reviews to be entertained, to be amused, to enjoy ourselves in a moment of leisure, slouched in our favourite chair. We're not going to bother to ask questions about what we're reading. So what do we do with this phrase, "the growing problem of Indians"? We file it away in our mental cabinets and the next time we're talking to someone or writing email or writing in our journals or blogs or FB walls, we might mention that "a growing problem with Indians" caused Custer's last stand. Suddenly, we've gone from being killed for killing other people and trying to steal their land to having "a growing problem with Indians" causing the death of an American hero. And this piece of information continues to colour anything we read or hear or see about Native Americans. We "know" that "the government" had a "growing problem" with "Indians." Even though we really don't know anything at all. No facts have been imparted to us, our store of knowledge about the Native people, or the white Americans of that day, the number of protagonists and antagonists, is richer by not one iota. Instead, what we have is an assumption that masquerades as fact. One of that family of statements that lives in the land of "Everyone knows" and "they say."

"While, in general, politicians in Washington hoped that the Indians could be contained, the sentiment in the West was to eradicate them, especially after gold was discovered in the Black Hills, on the Sioux reservation."

Again, we're not actually being given any information here. "In general" is a nice way of saying "I'm not going to tell you how many." Not that we need to know. And what does it mean, to "be contained"? Is that the same as being "killed"? Eradicated? Rounded up on reservations? Why not just admit that the Americans of the time longed to seize the land of the Native people? Because that IS what we're talking about, you know. It's not as if he doesn't say that exact thing in the very next sentence, either.

"As civilization advanced the frontier towards the Pacific ..."

This one got to me. The assumption that the greedy people who were simply looking for new frontiers to exploit,new forests to cut down, new natives to shoot and steal the land from, that these wretches and scoundrels and flim-flam men had any right to be seen as the forces of civilization, is nothing short of ridiculous, and outright offensive. Mind you, I'm not arguing the concept of the Noble Savage, here. The nobility, or lack thereof, on the part of the savage has no bearing whatsoever on the civilization or lack thereof of those who would exploit, rape, and murder him.

In short, Weigand appears to conclude that Custer was done in by "manifest destiny," without ever bothering to explain that "manifest destiny" is that doctrine that justifies the bloody imperialistic genocide of the Natives, the First Nations of this land, and the theft of their land, as well as the war with Mexico to take by force that land that now constitutes the whole of the present-day United States of America. I guess it sounds a lot less appealing to say that Custer died because he believed that Native Americans should be exterminated and their lands stolen by force. I can't imagine why.

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Sally Kern, Ambulatory Fecontainer

If you didn't already know who Sally Kern is, feel free to look her up right here, which is where we pinched this horrifying photo.

Sally Kern's bigotry doesn't just aim itself at Teh Ghey. She is also no fan of women or minorities (no, she doesn't belong in either category), as she evinced by this speech. So why should it even be news that this dreadful cackling cow is making yet another gay-themed grab at headlines? She's got a book out. It's titled The Stoning of Sally Kern. Regrettably, it's not an instruction manual. Stupid twat, I mean, twit. Can you imagine having anything at all to do with this fetid ambulatory pigshit canister? No? Neither can we. Yet, somehow, she managed to find something that would join loins with her long enough to spawn. There's a persistent rumour in blogtopia that her husband, Southern Baptist minister Steven D. Kern, was once a member of the KKK. There's also the little matter of her gay son. Srsly. Click that link to read an interview with him. If your gaydar doesn't hit 12 out of a maximum of 10, let us know. These people just make us hork a big fat fucking hairball, OK? Srsly. And then there are people like this in the universe, who renew our faith in humanity and make it clear that the Kerns of this world are not a reason to give up on all its beauty, wonder, and awe:

The reason you have to "deal with" homosexuality is because these men and women are our fellow citizens. America is the people who show up. The show up for work, school, volunteer. They show up in the military, the police, the fire department (and the fire department calendars). They raise their kids and watch out for their neighbors.

The lesson I choose to take from 9/11 is not the paranoid fantasy that "they" are destroying us. It's that people are good. On that day, they called home to say "I love you". They helped strangers escape the danger -- sometimes dying in the effort. They fought back and made God work like the devil to take their lives. And they didn't check each other's religion, sexual preference, political party or immigration status.

Wonkette commenter JustPixelz

Yeah. That. Also, kittehz. We at this blog don't take our responsibilities lightly.

Too, FUCK YOU Sally Kerns! FUCK YOU very, very much, you horrendous bitch. Why can't all the people who have a problem with their GAY FAMILY just deal with it and leave the rest of us alone?

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Rick Santorum Wins

TWO awards!

World's Biggest Fucking Crybaby WHINER
Dan Savage's PayAttentionToYourName Slapfest

YAY, DAN!

Dan Savage's New Threat to Rick Santorum from Dan Savage

Now, Rick, don't get all huffy and LIE and pretend you don't know why the gay community is upset with you, you smarmy little shit. You know damn well your nasty, homophobic, closeted little mind has been squeaking forever about how much you HATE the gay. Judging from the number of gayhaters who have been exposed as complete and total fucking SISSYMARY QUEENS, it's probably time you shut up about that already, before Dan takes you out, or your boyfriend finally speaks up.

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OUT Of The Closets and Into The STREETS!!!!

Yay! New York just signed the Gay Marriage Bill, people, so what are you waiting for? Time to PAR-TAY DOWN!

FTA: "Republican Sen. Stephen Saland, who had been undecided about the bill and was one of the legislators who led the negotiations, announced during the debate on the Senate floor that he would support the bill, effectively giving it the 32 votes it needed to pass."

Everybody be sure to send a thank-you note to Rep. Saland, who will be targeted by homophobes for his support. He did the right thing, and it will cost him unless we all translate our thankyous into support at the polls. Thank you, Rep. Saland, for making this day happen!

TalkingPointsMemo has the details. And be sure to check out their pic of the celebrations at STONEWALL!!! Hai-yaah!

A great big huge gigantinormous thank you to Joshua Micah Marshall of TalkingPointsMemo who brought us this wonderful reportage.

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The S_Trump_et Whores On

We mean, of course, The Donald. Or should that read "whoreson"?

Today, our President, Barack Hussein Obama, released the long form of his birth certificate.

Ordinarily,this form is not available for viewing except to those having a personal interest in it — which is to say, the person whose birth it records or other immediate family members. Hawai'i's privacy laws also do not permit the State to release the original copy to anyone. The President requested a waiver of such laws in order to release this piece of paper.

No other President — nor even any nominee for the office — has ever been required to prove their citizenship. So let's be perfectly straightforward and clear about this whole brouhaha. Had President Obama been white, the question would never even have arisen. On what grounds do I assert this? These:

• John McCain was never asked to produce his documents, despite the fact that he was NOT born in the US;
  

  
  

• Birfers are trying to change state and Federal laws — and possibly even the Constitution — to take away the right to citizenship jus soli, i.e., by virtue of having been born on US soil. They are also trying to alter the right to citizenship jus sanguinis, i.e., by right of blood. Currently, the Constitution recognizes both conditions as conferring citizenship. "Birther bills" on the State level actually require potential nominees to have *both* parents born on US soil. The fact that this would exclude Mitt Romney (whose father was born in Mexico) and Donald Trump (whose mother was born in Scotland) hasn't yet penetrated their crania, I suppose.
  

  
  

• These are the same people who, when Arnold Schwartzenegger the foreign-born brainless Austrian bodybuilder was making his stab at power, were willing to amend the Constitution to allow him to run for President. Yet they're not willing to accept the mixed-race child of a white American mother as a "real American" without making him leap through hoops despite what their OWN FUCKING LAWS SAY.

I'm furious and disgusted with the media's complicity in all this. With their endless bullshit, their boob job coverage, their fertility stories, their Royal wedding coverage, their bullshit about the teabaggers who can barely get 300 people to show up for most events, their refusal to cover the 100,000 who marched in Wisconsin. I'm sick of it. So I found this video on Crooks&Liars, which I cannot recommend highly enough. Please to watch. And then please spread the word. Because he's absolutely correct, every word of it.

Contact NBC and let them know what you think. They really need to hear from people.

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Arizona Racist? You Decide

OK, remember when the State of Arizona and its Queen of Prunes, Jan Brewer, passed SB 1070? That hideous piece of legislation that basically criminalizes all brown people who might cross the State borders or dwell therein? And Jan Brewer even dragged Scary Failin' away from her special-needs child to come help whitewash the law?



Less than a month after that, Brewer signed into law HB 2281, which will ban ethnic studies in that benighted state. No more Native American history classes for the half-million Native Americans living in Arizona. No more Mexican history classes for the 2.x million American citizen Latinos who comprise one-third of the state's population.

Meanwhile, the state has begun targeting teachers "with heavy accents." The state has not specified which accents it finds unacceptable. However, the fact that Latinos are being audited, and white teachers are not, makes one go "Hmmm."

Given that during the 1990s, Arizona hired native Spanish speakers from Latin American nations for its bilingual-education program, one can't help but wonder what the difference is between those apparently well-qualified yet accented speakers then and now.

The year George Bush was elected, Arizona voters passed an English-only bill, and bilingual teachers switched to English-medium classes. Those teachers have, apparently, been teaching their students just fine for two decades. But what a coincidence! Now that SB 1070 is law, their performance has miraculously degraded in a mere matter of weeks to an unacceptable level. These teachers will be "reassigned" (to what? If their accent is deemed to be incomprehensible to their students, what purpose is served by reassigning them, and where will they go? And if it is not incomprehensible, what purpose is served by such reassignment?) or fired. Of course, the fact that Arizona is facing a dire shortage of teachers is not even mentioned. Does that rate another "Hmm"? Hell fuckin' yeah. In fact the number of "Hmms" these actions have, and should, cause has us all here sounding like fucking hummingbirds.

Together, the Latino and Native American population of Arizona comprise approximately half the total population. And that, apparently, has some Bush cronies really worried. Apparently, Arizona racists like Russell Pearce, AZ state senator who thinks Latinos breed like bunnies, is hoping that by creating this legislation he will force undocumented migrant workers out of the state, and bugger all the documented American citizens who end up thrown in jail or out of the country because they don't have their papers on them.

And before y'all get all self-righteous on us with "That would never happen, the law says no racial profiling," go read these here links and then make up your mind.

Let me tell you just how bad things are right now: Some fucking witless bunch of teabaggin' ball-slurpers in fucking Ohio has announced a contest. Winners are invited to spend a week in Arizona "chasing aliens," and are reminded to "bring their green cards" with them.



This is why we all need to protest whenever shit like this happens, people. The idiot who dreamed up this incredibly insulting racist shit got his quantity of assholes increased by several as irate citizens contacted his radio station. The station manager has since apologized for this piece of shit (who has yet to offer his own fucking apology, by the way). So keep it up. You might not think you're being heard, and you might not think that you make a difference. But you are, and you do.

Without your calls and emails and letters, these fuckers would just have carried on being the fucking fuckety fucked fuckacious assholes that they've always been and will always be. At least now they know we're listening and if they don't want multiple rectal orifices, they'll quit spewing shit out of them.

Mind you, this is far from over. Just this month, artists painting a mural at a school in Prescott were told by the principal to lighten the skin colour of the pupils that they painted in the mural to a lily shade of white. Excuse me, what the FUCK? WHAT? These are actual real fucking live fucking children who attend this fucking school, the mural is part of revitalizing the downtown area, funded by a private organization and depicts the actual fucking children for christ's fucking sake!



How crazy fucking insane do you have to be to insist that black and brown children who attend this school be depicted as white? FTA:

City Councilman Steve Blair spearheaded a public campaign on his talk show at Prescott radio station KYCA-AM (1490) to remove the mural.

In a broadcast last month, according to the Daily Courier in Prescott, Blair mistakenly complained that the most prominent child in the painting is African-American, saying: "To depict the biggest picture on the building as a Black person, I would have to ask the question: Why?"

You would, you fat wrinkled rapidly aging bigot. Jesus. Holy quacking duckshit! What kind of people are these. It never occurred to me (or to any of you, I'll bet) to ask the question "Why" someone decided to paint a black face in a mural. Of course, the principal is now claiming this was simply a question of art, not actually whitening the children. Yeah, right. Just like your fucking laws aren't racist, Arizona.

You'll be happy to hear that the parents and teachers love the mural as it is. Upon questioning, the principal admitted that he had received a whole three complaints about the mural. As for those miserable fucks who drove by to scream epithets like "Nigger" and "Spic" at the kids who were helping on the mural, you ought to be ashamed of yourselves, but you're troglodytes, so you aren't. Fortunately, there's not as many of you as you thought. You pigs. Oh, wait, that's a terrible insult to pigs which are actually very nice animals.

At any rate, a big thank you to those of you who complained. Steve Blair has been fired from the radio show. Your right to free speech has not been infringed, Mr. Blair. You're free to get on your soapbox in the local park anytime and yell your hate speech. You're not free to use the public airwaves to felch the haters though. So fuck you very much, and may you live the rest of your life in a bitter oblivion, you anal afterbirth.

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Boycott Arizona!

ICHC

By now, the only people who haven't heard of SB 1070, Arizona's Immigration Bill, are the acephalous. Because, you know, this feckin' thing has been teh Talking Point of every rightwing nutjob windbag since the first of them crawled back into the slime from which the rest of us fled.

While we would never incinerate that you, dear visitor, might be one of the impaired, we will, nevertheless, post a link to that foul piece of legislation, just so you can cast your seasoned and cynical eyeball over it.

One of the major talking points bandied about by the aforementioned RWNJs (Right-Wing Nut Jobs, for those of you who were not paying attention) is that the Arizona legislation is Teh Good and Totally Not Stinky Because It's Exactly Teh Same as Teh Nanny-Nanny-Boo-Boo Federal Legislation, So Suck It Lib H8ers.

Yeah, right. Here for your perusal is the Federal legislation, also known as the Immigration and Nationality Act, Title 8 of the U.S.C.

While the Arizona law refers extensively to Federal law, it goes way beyond what Federal law envisioned as appropriate in criminalizing the presence of undocumented migrant workers.

And it is a great danger to the civil liberties of American citizens and especially to American taxpayers.

For example, Title II, Chapter 7, Article 8 G states:

G. A PERSON WHO IS A LEGAL RESIDENT OF THIS STATE MAY BRING AN ACTION
37 IN SUPERIOR COURT TO CHALLENGE ANY OFFICIAL OR AGENCY OF THIS STATE OR A
38 COUNTY, CITY, TOWN OR OTHER POLITICAL SUBDIVISION OF THIS STATE THAT ADOPTS
39 OR IMPLEMENTS A POLICY OR PRACTICE THAT LIMITS OR RESTRICTS THE ENFORCEMENT
40 OF FEDERAL IMMIGRATION LAWS TO LESS THAN THE FULL EXTENT PERMITTED BY FEDERAL
41 LAW. IF THERE IS A JUDICIAL FINDING THAT AN ENTITY HAS VIOLATED THIS
42 SECTION, THE COURT SHALL ORDER THAT THE ENTITY PAY A CIVIL PENALTY OF NOT
43 LESS THAN ONE THOUSAND DOLLARS AND NOT MORE THAN FIVE THOUSAND DOLLARS FOR
44 EACH DAY THAT THE POLICY HAS REMAINED IN EFFECT AFTER THE FILING OF AN ACTION
45 PURSUANT TO THIS SUBSECTION.

Pardon the formattage, it's from a PDF and this is just what Blogger does to it.

What does this section do? It allows any fucking nutbag who is a citizen *or resident* of Arizona to sue any police officer and any police department if they think such officer/department is not enforcing this law stringently enough.

I don't recall Federal law containing any such provision. Note that since police departments are funded by taxpayers, it is the taxpayers who must pay all costs associated with such lawsuits. Now why would the legislators of Arizona want to screw the citizens because they get a woody from h8n' on "teh illegalz"?

And how many cities are so wealthy that they can afford to cough up between $1K and $5K per day, if successfully sued?

It also permits the same mentally deficient RWNJs to sue any city or other state-level entity that adopts a "sanctuary" policy. Which, frankly, sucks. But what the abovementioned language means for the law enforcement personnel who have to put it into practice in the streets is that if you call the cops because, oh, I dunno, you're being raped or murdered? And someone else calls reporting a suspected "illegal alien"? You're shit outa luck, because the PD won't get sued if it doesn't immediately show up to save your injured ass. It will fershure get sued if some litigious asshole made the "illegal alien" call and found out that the police failed to respond or did not respond swiftly enough.

Arizona, you sure you want this shitty law?

And that's just the peripheral stuff.

Here's the real reason why this law seriously sucks hind end:

The right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects, against unreasonable searches and seizures, shall not be violated, and no warrants shall issue, but upon probable cause, supported by oath or affirmation, and particularly describing the place to be searched, and the persons or things to be seized.

This, boyz'ngurlz, is the Fourth Amendment to the Constitution of the United States. It is part of what is called The Bill of Rights.

For decades now, the courts have chipped away at various provisions of the Bill of Rights, but none so brutally and continually as the Fourth Amendment. See, the Fourth Amendment prevents the government from violating its citizens rights to a great degree. It says "... no warrant shall issue but upon probable cause, ..." et cetera. This means the cops can't haul your ass to jail for looking, or dressing, or even acting funny without swearing under oath that they have a good reason to believe that you're a dangerous criminal. They can't bust down your door, they can't enter your home, they can't stop you when you walk down the street, they can't do shit to you without that little piece of paper signed by a judge and sworn to under oath. So if the cops lie to get that little piece of paper, they're guilty of perjury and you have the right to sue their asses off.

However, this law amends Section 13-3883 of the Arizona Revised Statutes to permit the police to arrest without a warrant, not just for dangerous felonies and suspected terrorism, which we would probably all agree is justified by the demands of public safety, but also for mere misdemeanors. Under this law, the cops can come into your house and demand to see everyone's papers if there's too many people in your house, or you're violating some noise ordinance, or there's a car on blocks in your yard.

The po-pos can impound your vehicle if you give someone a ride without inquiring for evidence of their immigration status. Isn't that nice? Give your elderly neighbour a ride to church? Bam! Go to jail, do not collect, etc. Give your friend's kids a ride home from school? Tough shit for you if they were born someplace else and are "undocumented." Wifey in the car had a little nip of alcohol? If she's under 21, off you go to teh jailhouse. What's even worse, the law specifies that your insurance company has no duty to pay any charges that you might rack up during this period. What, not even while you're pleading your innocence and wrongful arrest through the courts? Nice.

This law also shifts the burden of proof regarding entrapment charges to the defendant. If the cops entrap you into doing something illegal (we all know the honourable po-pos would never do that, right?), this law says it is up to you the citizen to prove that they entrapped you. As a rule, the burden of proof has been on the prosecution because the Government has vast resources and power, compared to the average citizen. It is less costly for the Government to prove that it has clean hands than for you, joe citizen, to prove that it does not.

Nowhere in the Constitution or in Title 8 of the USC does it say that an American citizen must carry identification on their person at all times. But SB 1070, the Aryanzona law (as it's popularly known among the bright sparks of the InnerTubes) says that if the cops stop your ass for, I dunno, crossing against a light? Walking your dog off leash? Parking in the wrong zone? — they can ask you for ID, and if you don't have any, it's off to the hoosegow with you, buddy.

Don't take my word for it. Sheriff Joe Arpaio of Maricopa County, AZ, has done this several times. In his opinion, it's totally cool to throw all the brown people in jail and release the US citizens later. Does this sound like the Fourth Amendment is being respected and obeyed at all in Aryanzona?

And when did AZ flatfoots become experts in determining the ethnicity of a brown person, let alone their possible immigration status? Because, you know, stuff like this happens all the time.

By now you're probably sick of hearing about this. I'm certainly sick of writing about it. In honour of the humongous fucking headache this issue has given me, I'd like to leave you with this very enjoyable video clip.



And for the last word, we turn to the Native inhabitants of this land:



We'll be blogging on this issue regularly. Stay tuned.

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OK, What-All's in the Water Down South?

Anybody know?

Because, yaknow, we here at La Casa de Los Gatos are having some serious problem understanding what the fuck is going on.

ICHC

Let's start with last week's little fiasco. A math teacher in Jefferson County, Alabama apparently decided the best way to teach his students about geometry was to give them a hypothetical about the correct angle to use when attempting to assassinate the President of the United States.

President of the United States in the Oval Office

Excuse me, what the fuck?

They finally put the sum'bitch on leave, but I'm willing to bet it was paid leave. And it took them forever to do it. Apparently the only reason the school put him on leave at all was because they were flooded with irate calls from all over the country. However, you'll be relieved to hear that the Secret Service did pay the little asshole a visit, which probably gave him diarrhoea for a week or two. Here's hoping it left teh burn of overuse and chilli dogs on his hemorrhoids. Fecking eejit. The school has not released his name. Wonder why? For those of you who care, his name is Gregory Harrison, and he teaches, or taught, at Corner High School.

So kudos to those of you who called. Until you did, the school was going to "have a conversation" with him. Probly along the lines of "Don't say stuff like that again in public, dood."

Martin Luther King's Assassination

Now, back when the Bouchebag Gee, Dumb? Yeah! was in charge, this is how teachers who did anything similar were treated:

Steve White, a science teacher at West Limestone High School near Athens, Alabama, was fired in 2006 after showing a film clip to his class in which President George W. Bush, members of his staff, and conservative personalities were referred to as "a–holes."

Incidentally, White was a Democratic candidate for the Alabama House of Representatives at the time. Imagine that, fired for telling the truth! I mean, how many people on this planet would disagree with the conclusion that conservative personalities are assholes? Geez, perhaps they're not. Perhaps they're GIANT MAJOR FUCKING OUTRAGEOUS SYPHILITIC ASSHOLES! There, I feel better already.

OK, it might look like I'm pickin' on poor ol' 'Bama, what with that story about the right Reverend or whatever you call those Baptist preachers, you know, that guy Aldridge with the two wetsuits and a condom-covered dildo stuck up his ass; followed by that darling little story about the homophobic, anti-sex-toy Attorney General of the State being busted by his wife schtupping his GAYGAYGAYGAYGAY male aide in the marital bed.

But, trust me on this, we're equal opportunity oppressors at mi Casa, just like Dear Old Mum. Catholic, as it were, in our hatreds. In fact, our next story takes place in Lumpkin County, Georgia.

I know. WTF were those dumb lumps thinking when they named the fecking place?

In the event, another fucking high-school teacher in that god-forsaken place apparently decided it was cool for her high-school advanced placement students to study racism by filming themselves cavorting around in — you guessed it, Ku Klux Klan costumes.

http://badgals-radio.com/

Except she didn't mention this little fact to anyone else in the school.

Imagine the surprise of the black and brown kids in the school who are sitting there eating their lunch when in come a bunch of assholes in Klan sheets with pointy hoods. Excuse me, Catherine Ariemma, what the fuck were you thinking? So far so bad, but here's where things take a turn for the abso-fucking worst.

The Klan-costumed kids start taunting the black kids and end up by inviting one of the black kids to join them in re-enacting a lynching.

Lynching

We leave it to you to determine what part the black kid would have played.

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The White Women's Workout

OMG. It's really sad that such a fine fine piece of comedy has received less attention than it should have.

Especially in this sad day of obesity and lack of fitness on the part of the American populace.

Please join me in applauding this terrific new workout that helps you shed pounds while maintaining a sense of humour. Or something.



Oh, come on, you KNOW you loved it.

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Do I Look Like A Lesbian To You?

Over at The Political Carnival (cue calliope music), Laffy astounds us all with this wonderful video:



Which poses the question of why the fuck it is OK to ask people that you think might be gay about their sexuality, yet nobody asks straight people if they ever practice sodomy (you know, like anal sex which is apparently pretty popular with the teenage Christian straight population, who want to save the other orifice for their Jebus-sanctioned fucking), or those dreadfully perverse practices such as anilingus, cunnilingus, fellatio, mutual masturbation, manual stimulation of various body parts, et cetera, ad infinitum, ad nauseam.

Notice that we do not even begin to mention the many paraphilias rampant in this world of ours — sadism, masochism, coprophilia, water sports, full-body massages from rentboys (see Reker, George, or Rentboy.com for details).

Also, teh softball? Denizens of La Casa de Los Gatos hold that you can't claim to be a real dyke unless you play field hockey. Softball is for pussies (um, you know, that is, what I mean, uh ... never mind).

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Arizona, Land of Teh Demented

and home of the cowering racists.

ICHC

Yup, they did it. The state of Arizona passed SB1070, giving regular police officers the right to request documentation from people to ascertain their immigration status. What does this mean? It means every brown person in or passing through the state of Arizona is liable to be stopped by some dinky asshole like Joe Arpaio who might feel like a little grandstanding and harassment.

Is the legislature of Arizona so fucking demented and stupid that it thinks pissing off Latinos/Latinas is a good idea?

Rhetorical question. Obviously, it does.

Well, you dumbshits, consider that any decent person, regardless of their ethnicity or skin colour, must take issue with a law so blatantly unjust and unfair, and unconstitutional on its face. And consider that any person who is not white is far more likely to be stopped than any person who is not. And consider that there are many light-skinned Europeans here who have "overstayed" their tourist visas, who rarely, if ever, get stopped and asked for their papers. And that the original inhabitants of your benighted state, of whom there are still quite a few residing there, happen to look quite similar to the people that you will be profiling under this new law, irony of ironies.

If the Native people had passed an immigration law like this, none of y'all would be sitting on these shores yawping about how you need to keep their relatives out of what has now become your country.

And since arguments about human rights and Constitutionality and racial discrimination and profiling don't move you, consider this: you're about to lose a large proportion of your already brutally exploited undocumented labour force. This should translate into high prices for produce (who the fuck do you think picks your goddamn tomatoes and lettuce?) as well as for heavy labour. Say goodbye to your maids, gardeners, dishwashers, busboys, waitrons, casual labour, at low, low wages. Say hello to paying a fair wage for a fair day's work, and, yeah, food prices are going up again, so maybe this will help your goddamned diet?

In the interest of helping Arizonans stay thin and focused, this blog highly recommends you hie thee over to this here site and boycott Arizona until they figure out that they're violating the Constitution themselves (14th Amendment thereto), and that their very attempt to regulate immigration is a further violation of the Constitution, as this is an issue for the Federal Government to decide. Funny how all those Tenth Amendment States' Righters are keeping their fetid gobs shut about this one.

Must be too difficult to talk out both sides of one's neck on this issue, eh?

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Politics: Freedom of Speech Is Important

... ONLY if we're the ones practicing it.

Photo from Rick Kaempfer's fine blog

Is anybody surprised? Teabaggers are only pro-free speech when it's their free speech at stake.

Your free speech? Hey, fuck you very much. And fuck your free speech too. In fact, if we don't like what you're saying, we reserve the right to call your employer and make such a fuss that they fire you.

The Huffington Post is reporting that firing was the fate of the unfortunate D.C. Douglas, an actor who does voice-overs for Geico. Well, did. Thanks to his call to the FreeDUMBWorks astroturf pseudo-TP (that's Tea Party for those who had their minds someplace grubbier), Mr. Douglas has been fired by Geico.

Well, Geico, you could — and should — have handled this much better. I know I won't be doing business with you ever again if I can avoid it.

If you feel the same way about this ridiculous foofaraw, please feel free to call Freedom works (yeah, right, for whom?) toll-free at 1.888.564.6273.



Update: Mr. Douglas is requesting that people do NOT contact Geico, with whom he says he has an amicable relationship. Therefore, I am removing the contact information for them. Even if I still think they could have handled this better.

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World: Uganda Wants Death Penalty For LGBTQ

The Huffington Post is reporting that, following visits by conservative American Christians, lawmaker David Bahati of Uganda is proposing a sweeping law aimed at LGBTQ Ugandans that includes life imprisonment or the death penalty for being gay, as well as severe penalties for those who rent homes to, employ, or fail to report homosexuals to the authorities:

The Ugandan legislation in its current form would mandate a death sentence for active homosexuals living with HIV or in cases of same-sex rape. "Serial offenders" also could face capital punishment, but the legislation does not define the term. Anyone convicted of a homosexual act faces life imprisonment.

Anyone who "aids, abets, counsels or procures another to engage of acts of homosexuality" faces seven years in prison if convicted. Landlords who rent rooms or homes to homosexuals also could get seven years and anyone with "religious, political, economic or social authority" who fails to report anyone violating the act faces three years.

While some African journalists and bloggers are characterizing the proposed legislation as aimed at those who knowingly infect others, especially children, with HIV, it is not clear that they are referring to the same legislation as the bill sponsored by Bahati. A request for clarification has not received a response.

Although Bloomberg has since reported in an update from its Kampala bureau that both the proposed death penalty and life imprisonment have been dropped from the bill, this might well be a reaction to the outcry in other countries against this hideous legislation.

Peter Kent, Canadian Minister of State for Foreign Affairs, has characterized the bill as "vile and hateful," and has stated that Canada would raise the issue with its Ugandan counterparts at a Commonwealth summit held in Trinidad and Tobago this weekend.

This blog agrees. The proposed legislation is against all ethics and all human rights laws, nationally and internationally. You simply *cannot* execute people for being who/what they are. Science has shown that homosexuality is genetically determined.

What You Can Do

The United States currently gives Uganda approximately $60 million annually in aid. Please contact your legislator and request that such aid be made contingent upon Uganda's observation of the United Nations' Universal Declaration of Human Rights. Please also contact the Ugandan Embassy in your country and voice your opposition to this law *politely*. You can reach the Ugandan Embassy in the U.S. here. You can also contact the Uganda Human Rights Commission to urge them to act on this. According to AllAfrica.com, Uganda is a signatory to the UDHR. Thank you.

Under Article 51 of the Constitution of Uganda, the UHRC, among other functions is mandated to monitor the government's compliance with Constitutional provisions and international human rights instruments on human rights. It is their duty to ensure that Mr. Bahati and President Museveni adhere to human rights standards.

Gay Americans are taxpayers, and we resent our taxes paying for the oppression and murder of our brothers and sisters anywhere in the world.

Christians, if you believe what Your Teacher taught, now is the time to speak up and stand with your gay brothers and sisters. Jesus would not have condoned the killing of people who have committed no wrong. If you feel it is wrong for a person to love someone of the same gender, remember that it is for your God, and not you, to judge. Vengeance is mine, saith the Lord. I shall repay.

Let he who is without sin cast the first stone, said your Jesus. Do not let your brethren in the fundamentalist church drag you all into opprobrium by condemning others to death.

In case you haven't seen it, Rachel Maddow has done a yeoman job of reportage on the event.

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Politics: From The Department of

Holy mother of god, you can't make this shit up.

No matter how hard you try.



Wingnuttia in all its rancid, um, glory? Gloryholeyness? Holy quacking duckshit, people. Not a single one of these benighted dipshits has the first fucking clue what they're talking about. Not one. Just listening to them makes our brain hurt. Fascism=Socialism=Communism? Do they have the first fucking clue that millions of progressives, liberals, and socialists came together to defeat the fascist Germany, Italy, and Japan during World War II? That millions of people died to rid this world of fascism? That the fascists hunted down and murdered progressive Socialists and labour organizers and ... most frightening of all ... just about anybody who looked and talked like this bunch of morons?

In the Third Reich, every single one of these hapless fools would have been sterilized on eugenic grounds. Their collective IQ is probably lower than the number of teeth they possess.

Please. Listen to them for as long as you can. It'll make you hurl. Jayzus is King. Fuck you, manureheads. Jayzus may be your fucking king, but this country has a constitution that says NO FUCKING KINGS ANY MORE! No how, no way. And church is SEPARATE from State. So fuck you and your Jayzus. Take your caterwauling to your fucking insane brethren and cistern. Shrieking Shiva! The Marching Morons, by gum.

PS: Is it just me or are they a bunch of old, fat, white, out-of-shape turds who are probably benefiting from the very same "gubmint-run" programs that they're protesting? Yaknow, Social Security, Medicare, Medicaid, VA, disability benefits, workers' comp, unemployment benefits, and the like? And what a diverse group!

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Entertainment: ZOMFG

Uh ... not sure if this is funny or simply insane. Think of it as an exercise in surrealism. Surrealism as humour. Humour as surrealism. Republicans are teh crazy and they ain't gettin' no better:



So. Is this Bizarroworld Crayzee, or what?

This is the Kitty Pilgrim interview to which O Rly? Taintz refers:



This is the birth certificate that O Rly? Taintz claims is President Obama's "Kenyan birth certificate."

Over at Politijab, some enterprising soul has made an absolutely viral-worthy analysis of said BC.

Kos himself has pointed out some of the major glaring, um, inconsistencies in the document Taintz claims to be President Obama's REAL birth certificate.

The news media has not been far behind in pointing out the obvious forgery, either.

Meanwhile, some enterprising soul has filed a complaint with the State Bar of California (the only state in which Taintz, who received her "law degree" from a mail-order diploma mill, is licensed to practice) against Dr. Atty. Mrs. Taekwondo Black Belt Realtor O Rly Taintz.

They don't come any nuttier than this broad. Does anyone agree with me that this just might be Sascha Baron Cohen in drag working on his next film? I mean, the blonde wig, the huge fake eyelashes, the drugged-looking eyes ...

ICHC FTW!

Yaknow, things are really bad when KKKarl Rove, the "Unseen Hand" behind some of the dirtiest dirty tricks in the Rethuglican Playbook, thinks you're nuckin' futz.

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Politics: Right-wing Terrorists

ICHC

Gee, I guess the whining of rightwingnuttia about that DHS report is starting to sound pretty hollow by now, huh? I mean, you can say the first guy was a "lone wolf." You could even cross your fingers behind your back and claim the second guy was a "lone wolf." But three in a row? That's pushing it, people. For what it's worth, boys and girls, the common factor in these three murderous wingnuts? They're all white-supremacists, racists who believe nonwhite people should be killed.

The first, Richard "Pop-a-cop" Poplawski, decided that President Obama was going to take away his guns and freedom, so he'd better kill some cops. Well, say what you will about the police, and there's plenty to say, one of their functions is, supposedly, to protect the public against people who start shooting murderously at others. End result? He killed three officers, but they got him in the end and took away his guns and his freedom. Way to go, dumbass, you certainly managed to enact that self-fulfilling prophecy.

And then there was the charming James W. von Brunn, member of the white supremacist organization Stormfront (no link, find it yourself) and erstwhile contributor to rightwing sites like Free Republic (more accurately known as Freetardia). Of course, you probably won't find Mr. von Brunn's comments or posts anywhere in wingnuttia now, all the sites which once welcomed him with open arms have scrubbed any trace of his presence. Oh, wait, there's still the Wayback Machine. And Google caches.

Today, it's Jason Eugene Bush, leader of the Minutemen. Bush (geez, is that name synonymous with criminal in some bizarre mystical way?), like the coward that he is, decided to break into someone's house late at night with no warning, with two buddies for backup, all armed to the teeth. Why? Because the guy whose house these idiots broke into was a Latino. Maybe he was an undocumented immigrant. Maybe not. Maybe he was dealing drugs. Maybe he was an innocent. Maybe it was mistaken identity. All of these are reasons you do NOT take this shit into your own hands.

And here's another bigger, better reason: These idiots broke into this house claiming to be police. They shot and killed the guy they claim was a baddie. Then they shot and killed his nine-year-old daughter. Why? Because she saw their faces. Because she might have been a witness against them. That is the worst fucking reason to kill a little kid, you know? Not that there's any good fucking reason, but hey, when they start screeching in E above high C, I'm thinkin' at least you could say you snapped. But this? This is cold-blooded murder of a young and defenseless creature at its worst.

Fortunately, the kid's mom was not so defenseless. She had a gun, and she used it. She shot Jason Bush.

And before y'all get all self-righteous and say, "Well, yaknow, PC, he was trying to put a criminal drug dealer out of business, and all," no. No, no, no. He wasn't. He and his buddies busted into that house to STEAL money and drugs. Not that "stopping a drug dealer" would have been a reason for them to do what they did. That's what we have police for. Gather evidence, if you must, and turn it over to the cops. They're trained on the use of force and can be held accountable.

This shit? This vigilantism? This is what kills innocent bystanders, little girls named Brisenia who might have had a life, dreams, hopes, a bright future, or even a dismal one, not that that's any of our business. I guess to people like (this) Bush, the life of a little brown girl named Brisenia is not as important as the life of a white man like himself, which is why he ran like a chicken when wounded.

The Arizona papers are reporting that all three of the Minutemen involved have been arrested. Will they be tried as terrorists? Or is that distinction reserved only for brown or Muslim people who commit such crimes?

Note: These minutemen, despite their racism in common with other Minutemen, are not the same as the superset of Minutemen from which they splintered at some point. Details at link.

Additional note: SOME PEOPLE might owe Janet Napolitano and the DHS a big fucking honking big-assed APOLOGY! Except they're too busy wringing their hands and opining as how James von Brunn was actually secretly a lefty, like all those evil Democrats who came to power last year, elected by the America-hating Americans who don't believe in guns as a solution and racism as a way of life.

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Entertainment: Today's Attack onTeh Ghey

Congratulations, LGBTQ brothers, sisters! Maine has become the fifth state to recognize full marriage equality for gay people.

And North Carolina legislator Virginia Foxx has written a letter of apology to Matthew Shepard's mother, Judy, after calling Matthew's cruel murder "a hoax" in her ludicrous argument against hate-crime legislation that would (finally!) afford gay people the same rights and protections straight people have. Needless to say, it's a non-apology sort of apology. You know, "I'm sorry if you were offended," as opposed to "I realize that my use of the word "hoax" was inaccurate and inappropriate and that it must have hurt you very deeply. I apologize for my insensitivity and my lack of empathy." That's OK, you stupid beast. Eventually, you, like the rest of your queer-hatin' cohorts, will go the way of the dinosaur or the dodo.

Meanwhile, Marion Barry unleashes his inner hypocrite by being the sole holdout in the DC vote for gay marriage — on the grounds that Teh Ghey is immoral and ol' Marion is simply trying to be the good ol' MORAL politician that he's always aspired to be. Fortunately, there IS a Jon Stewart, Marion, you pathetic asshole. And Jon ain't about to let Marion get away with that bullshit. See for yourself.

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart	M - Th 11p / 10c
Gaywatch - Marion Barry
thedailyshow.com
Daily Show Full Episodes Economic Crisis Political Humor

Because, of course, the God of the Bible hates Teh Ghey way more than he hates adultery, deception, cheating, drug usage, and betrayal of the public trust. Why, just look, right here in the bible he rails against Teh Ghey all of ... er, a couple of times. As opposed to adultery and lying, which both the Old and the New Testaments condemn repeatedly. So much for that. Oh, yeah, and the lobster. Don't forget about the lobster. And ham. Pork. Scallops. Shrimp. Catfish. All that stuff Marion Barry's probably been eating for years in defiance of God's Word.

Moral my ass.

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Politics: Goodbye To The Old

ICHC FailBlog *

No, wait, that's "Goodbye to the new, Hello to the old." If you haven't already heard, Michael Steele, former Lt. Governor of Maryland, and the only Black Republican who's gotten more than the crumbs off the Republican table in its entire history — is now back to getting crumbs off the table.

Yep. What did YOU think when Steele got elected Chair of the RNC? Did you think, "Wow, the Republican Party is wising up, they can see they need to be more inclusive, yada, yada, yada?" Of course not. Because YOU have something between your ears, like a brain. La Casa de Los Gatos had a reaction alright. We here at this fine blog, your hosts for the evening, we said, "Whoa, that man is a fool. Doesn't he know the only reason the Republicans are putting him out there is so they can take potshots at President Obama without being called racist to their face?"

They're hiding behind the Black guy taking shots at another Black (well, we know he's biracial, but those Republicans, they still think a single drop of Black blood in your ancestry makes you BLACK!) guy. They're putting brown Piyush ("Bobby" for those Texan legislators who can't pronounce his name) Jindal up as the shining new star who will be on the 2012 ticket for President. Well, they were, until he made a total ass out of himself with his rebuttal to Obama and his mocking of the money budgeted for volcano research right before that Alaskan volcano blew up.

ICHC, your source of LOLcattitude

So while the rest of us were cringing at the sight of Michael Steele being forced to retract his comments about Flush Rimbowl as an "ugly, incendiary" radio entertainer, while we watched him teabag Rushbo, the True Leader of the Republicans, while we wondered how many insults the Repubs could dump on him before he quit, Steele himself was joyously donning kneepads without complaint.

Well, OK. We all KNOW Rush runs the Rethug Party these days. Steele backed down because he didn't have the guts to take on that blubbery swine. Not many Republicans do. But when the Good Ol'boys Party announced that they didn't trust Steele with the money, we thought, this is it. Fer sure, he's gonna quit now and walk away with what's left of his dignity intact. But Newt Gingrich pretended to support him and it looked like he was going to sail on for a while. Still, the fact that these racist old bastards could even suggest "spending controls" on Steele that they didn't suggest to the last bunch of crooks and thugs who cleaned out their treasury should have been a hint to Steele, don't you think?

Uh-uh. No, sirree. I don't know what-all is wrong with that man, but it is soul-deep. Today, we learn from the official Moonie paper, the Washington Times, that Steele has made a backdoor deal with those same racist old bastards. They're taking control of the money away from him. Note: The link is to the Huffington Post story. I refuse to link to the Moonie times. You wanna get brainwashed by Sun Myaung Moon, do it on your own damn time.

I can understand the Repukes wanting some controls on Steele. After all, he's still under investigation for supposedly paying his sister's defunct company for work that was apparently never done, along with other questionable expenditures. And the Rethugs' repeated experiences with their dubiously-ethical fellow travelers have surely inspired them to err on the side of prudence. One hopes.

But when they force the man to rehire some of the weaselly backstabbers that he fired for using his nether side as a pincushion, you have to wonder.

The agreement, proposed by several current and former RNC officials, ... [makes] 33-year RNC veteran Jay Banning, who was fired by Mr. Steele along with his deputy last month, an on-call adviser to the RNC treasurer. Mr. Banning was seen as a trusted liaison to RNC members critical of Mr. Steele's tenure and financial management.

"I regard them - the Steele administration - bound by it," former Republican National Committee General Counsel David Norcross told The Times on Tuesday.

So, Michael, it's time to get up on your hind legs and walk off, before they rub your face so deep in the crumbs you turn a glorious shade of beige.

I've never liked Steele, but I do feel sorry for him. The fact that he's accepting the indignities heaped upon his head makes him complicit in his own humiliation and makes me wonder where the fuck his self-respect is, but, you know, people who grew up in an era where racism was rife learned to bow and scrape to get by, and maybe this is just a manifestation of old, painfully-learned habits. Maybe. Because, you know, if not, I don't know. Just, durr, I guess.

The only joy to be derived from this is in the comments by the many Republicans who post at the Moonie Times. Therefore I offer herewith a small sample for your LOLment:

[Name removed]

how dumb. once again, the narrow-minded leaders of our party have shown their stupidity. when will it stop? when we are merely a hate-bating cult with narrow interests and appeal to match our narrow-mindedness. pitiful.


[Name removed]

I don't know who Norcross, Pullen, Kaufman or Poitevint are, but they sound like dinosaurs. This power play is petty and self-defeating. You either have values or you don't and if these people want to compromise their values, then they can do a "Specter". To make Mr. Steele re-hire someone he fired....is the height of insult and arrogance. I don't know Mr. Banning either, but my guess is he is a Rino just like the four already named. I am an Independent with conservative leanings and these men make me want to tell them all where to go because THEY are the problem, not the cure.


[Name removed]

I think it's great that there are people putting a short leash on Steele. What's wrong with having some sort of checks and balances on expenditures?


[Name removed]

We lost to Scott Murphy in NY because "insiders" played power games rather than concentrating on winning an election. If they kick Steele out my monthly contributions will stop and I'll just concentrate on state races. What are they trying to do, show how effectively they can repeat McCain 08?


[Name removed]

Michael Steele, an impressive self-made man has now been punked twice by the Republican party. First, someone bamboozled him into a suicidal senate campaign against Benjamin Cardin, a long-time Democrat apparatchiki in a state dominated by yellow-dog Democrats. If he'd stayed on as LT Governor of Maryland, he was a virtual shoo-in to succeed Bob Ehrlich, who, without Steele at his side, threw away his re-election. Next, someone convinced this bright but gullible man that he could make a difference as Chairman of the RNC. I suspect the appointment was made with the full knowledge the committee would castrate him as they've done. What a waste.


[Name removed]

I can't figure out why the chose him only to take away his powers and why he accepted the job, he looks and is so weak in his position, he is just a Republican joke now.


[Name removed]

[Name removed] says-- "I think it's great that there are people putting a short leash on Steele" A short leash-huh? Where no leash has ever been put before; around the neck of the RNC Chairman. This has further made the GOP seem petty and suicidal.


[Name removed]

I say the hell with running an election to win. It's time we either retake the Republican Party from the "ELITES" or create our own new one. Our forefathers, as well as great Americans today, have and are laying their lives down for principle. Without principles the REPUBs have degenerated into DEMOs light, manipulated by George Soros as he is the pupetmaster for Sen McCain and President Obama. Secure the borders Drill and Build Re-establish American Manufactoring Fair Tax NOW Quit bankrupting our Nation!


[Name removed]

In addition, I will NEVER again vote for any globalist, International, New World Order, CFR member again. American Independence from Trans National Kapitalist! The two party system has evolved into a TOTAL joke.


[Name removed]

I have not followed the RNC until lately, but to date I am not impressed with anything they have done. Mr Steele is a moderate to my opinion and I disagree with that stance. I am becoming more of the opinion we need a new party - Fiscal Conservative Constitutionalists. It used to be the RNC was that party, but not for a very long time.


[Name removed]

I am for the right of citizens to carry and possess guns. That right evidently includes foot shooting by the leaders of the few.This is the same group that pushed in McCain and Dole and maintains the election of candidates by the minority within the circle. Bring back leadership and say so long to the old white mens party of the few.


[Name removed]

Interesting comments here, I don’t believe anyone could argue the fact that McCain is a Fiscal Conservative. I really wish he would have won the election because he is not one of the few radical right extremists’ left over from last century. As a republican living here in Pa. surrounded by mostly democrats, I know Mr. Steele is very correct not wanting to label all democrats as “socialists”. Do you realize how many people would be highly insulted? Don’t we want to build and strengthen the Republican Party?


[Name removed]

haha hello mr. figurehead they should just elect a new chairman and make it official

Incidentally, if it makes you happy, Piyush Jindal is groveling at Rushbo's rear end awaiting the moment when he can plant those puffy fish lips (obligatory Salman Rushdie reference) in the required kiss, truly an osculum obscaenum.

* For those who didn't get the Pizza Picture: the whilom leaders of the Republican Party — Jeb Bush (AIIIEEE!! Another scion of that cursed house?!?), Eric Cantor, John McCain, and some other weasel whose name I've already forgotten — met last weekend at a pizza parlor to "rebrand" the Republican Party. It's now the National Council for a New America. It would have been less full of FAIL and PWNAGE if they hadn't handed out press releases that got the name of the group wrong — National Cabinet for a New America. Further FAIL and PWN was assertively solicited by Cantor when he brayed about how this bunch of punks was gonna get on a campaign bus or something and go on a Listening Tour. Until Flush Rimbowl heard about it. Since Rush is deaf due to some serious drug abuse, he doesn't want nobody doin' no listening. So he abused Cantor in no uncertain terms. Now Cantor has withdrawn all them listeninging and announced that he will, as Rushbo ordered, be taking a teaching tour. Good work, GOP!! Tell the sheeple what to think. Why bother listening to the masses, that bunch of woolly-brained baaa-lambs?

No, this is not El Blobbo, just some random cute, grubby, rude brat

In other heart-cockle-warming news, Teh Blobular Bigot gave Arlen Specter the rigid-digit salute for a goodbye gesture and told him to get out (of the Republican Party) and "take McCain and his daughter with you." To my utter amazement, McCain, who is famous for losing his volatile temper and shoving little old ladies in wheelchairs apparently fears El Blobbo just as much as the other weak-kneed maiden aunts of the Republican Party. Even Meghan McCain, who has had all of one job in her whole life, and needn't fear being fired or blacklisted (not with Mommy's hundred million dollar estate) fails to deploy her acid tongue in response. Is there a single courageous individual in the Republican Party? No, of course not.

And I'm glad.

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Entertainment? Say WHAT?

The Gothamist is reporting (along with about half a dozen other papers, so the caca will hit the fan right soon, I'm thinkin') that some ambulatory turd by the name of Ted Kefalinos, proprietor of Lafayette French Pastry, a bakery in Greenwich Village, NYC (yeah, I know. Who'd'a thunk?) decided to make "Drunken Negro Face" cookies to ... um, honour? ... the election of our new President, Barack Obama, and commemorate Martin Luther King, Jr.'s birthday at the same time.

To add insult to injury, the dumb shithead had the gall to ask a (no doubt former) customer, "Would you like some drunken negro heads to go with your coffee? They're in honor of our new president. He's following in the same path of Abraham Lincoln; he will get his."

What the fuck is the matter with these people? Does anybody know? Because there's bound to be some good money in uncovering the, what, gene that causes this kind of ass-enveloped-head stupidity. What, he thought the whole country was gonna be so tickled they'd each order a case and he'd be set for life or something?

I mean, Christ Criminy, what a fucking IDIOT! Figuring he hadn't stuck his foot deep enough in his mouth, he went for the kill when some other hapless customer showed up, and used the N-word (I'd love to use it myself to illustrate what an asshole this guy is, but you know, a whole lot of black people have asked everybody to please not use that word because it's racist and derogatory and they really don't like it, and I'm usually quick to oblige those wot ask nicely) and repeated that twaddle about the President will get what Lincoln got — to which all I gotta say is, Mr. Kefalinos, I sure do hope with all my heart and soul that the Secret Service pays you a not-so-secret call and you get a lengthy interrogation out of this.

It's one thing to call your President a dweeb and a jerk — free speech is enshrined in the Constitution, after all. It's quite another to hint around at threats on his life.

Let's hope that Greenwich Village and the fine city of New York respond by boycotting his store until he makes a public apology. Fool!

Oh, I almost forgot: the miserable blivet* says he's not a racist because his brother-in-law is Cuban. Huh?

*blivet is defined as 10 lb of shit in a 5-lb bag. Maybe we should rename it a Kefalinos.

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