Politics: The Haramzada Gets The Joota

By now, the entire civilized (and possibly even some of the less-civilized) world has heard about Muntadar al-Zaidi, the plucky Iraqi journalist who dared to tell Bush exactly what many Iraqis thought of his "War on Terra" in Iraq.

In case anyone out there has a very very short attention span, Muntadar al-Zaidi is the guy who yelled "This is from the widows and orphans of Iraq, you dog," or something very like it, at Georgie while flinging both of his shoes at the Fratboy in Chief.



Yeah, yeah, yeah, I've heard people say repeatedly that the man should have been more ... restrained? (If he wasn't before, he sure as fuck is now, lemme tellya. As in, imprisoned with his hands and feet tied up either before, during, or after the hella beating he took for, um, voting with his feet. Or his footgear, at least.) al-Zaidi's current status is unknown. An Iraqi judge has vowed to conduct an inquiry into the assault on Mr. al-Zaidi. Code Pink has sponsored a petition to support the gentleman, if you care to sign up.

On the lighter side, some kind soul has set up a Web site to thank Mr. al-Zaidi for his fateful shoe-throw.

Unfortunately, the idiots who arrested al-Zaidi destroyed his shoes in the "search" for explosives they conducted upon said footwear. They could have been between $100,000 and $10,000,000 richer today if they'd squirreled one or both away. Muntadar's brother, Dargham al-Zaidi, states that his brother bought Iraqi-made shoes for the purpose. However, a Turkish company, one Baydan Ayakkabicilik San. & Tic. (or Baydan Shoes, in English) claims that they are the designer and maker of the shoe in question and are happy to announce that their sales have shot up so much, they're looking into TV advertising in the coming year. To which, Americans mired in financial distress at the holiday season, must shrug and retort, "Well, at least he's helping someone's economy.

Never let it be said, however, that anyone has passed up an opportunity to make money off this supposed insult to Teh Leader of Teh Free (??) World. The entrepreneurial spirit thrives in the bosom of one Kenney Jacob, who has posted here for your further enjoyment the "Throw Shoe at Bush" game, one that we all here at La Casa de Los Gatos highly recommend, irritating music and all.

If you want to yell at the Haramzada in Arabic at the same time, try this site. Wired has a nice piece (complete with flash games) on the plethora of other Concerned Citizens and Furrners who felt called upon to memorialize the Idiot'nThief's, um, booting. And DuckDuckBush lets you throw lots of other fun stuff at Der Dumbkopf, but not, alas, scheiss. However, they do let you suggest other things to throw, so if anyone sees fit to head over there with suggestions, hey.

To all of those who are planning to get your knickers in knots about the disrespect this post and all those linked hereto are showing to the President of the U.S.A., I'd like to point out that the somewhere between four and five thousand of your fellow citizens who are dead and the estimated 100,000 maimed and injured are probably wishing they'd been able to hurl something more painful. Four million Iraqis are refugees inside and outside their own country, and I'll bet they'd like to be in on the throwing. Add the more than one million Iraqi, Afghani, and Pakistani dead and the countless numbers of maimed and injured. Don't forget the one in seven who can't buy sufficient food for themselves and their families, the children who are literally dying of malnutrition, and the uncounted number who are being attacked on the basis of gender, sexual preference, or other failure to conform to the hardline Islamist nutcases we have put in power.

If they could do anything they wanted to the man they consider responsible for the death, disability, disappearance, and torture of their loved ones, I don't think they'll be reaching for a mere shoe.

Note: Although many translate haramzada as "bastard," that translation is incorrect. Haram is an Arabic word meaning "unclean." Think treyf. Treyf is a Hebrew word that is applied to things that are forbidden under the Mosaic laws. Haram is the Arabic equivalent. Thus, dogs are haram (though not windhounds, search me); pigs or anything made of them is haram; bottom-dwelling seafood is haram. Zada is a Farsi word meaning "son of." (The female equivalent would be zadi.)

Joota is a Hindi word meaning shoe, or shoes. Although some of you may remember having heard the old filmi song, Mera joota hai Japani, we would like to take this opportunity to point out to you that an updated version is being created for the InterTubes, titled Mera joota hai Iraqi.

For those who wonder about the significance of throwing a shoe or two at Gee Dumbya, kindly consult Salman Rushdie's brilliant novel, Shame, in which he recounts the creation of a garland of shoes as suitable wear for the shameless females Munni, Chunni, and Bunny, who chose to become pregnant without the benefit of that holy matrimony which our straight brothers and sisters so strenuously deny to their gay and lesbian siblings.

Finally, some wise soul has recommended that those who agree with Mr. al-Zaidi instantly mail an old shoe or two to Preznitwit Booooosh, at the white house. DO IT NOW so them shoes don't end up on President Obama's lawn. You might want to put a note on the package like "If unable to deliver before 01/15/2009, please return to" and put the nearest Goodwill store's address on it. Or something.

Thanks to FOTPC and Ms. Manitoba for holding down the fort while I fought with lawyers, doctors, insurance company scumbags, and pain medication. That new knee is looking more likely in the coming year!

Stumble It!

The Countdown Clock

Man, those seconds just can't run out fast enough for me. Or any other of my fine fellow bloggers. The remaining denizens of La Casa de Los Gatos don't seem to care as long as they get their 18 hours of shuteye per day, interspersed with fine kibble, treats, toys, pets, catnip, and the daily constitutional exploration of the hillside, but.


Me, I can't bear waking up to a headline such as this:

Bush 'very pleased' with Iraq war outcome: Report

Is there anything that bothers this pathetic, revolting little man? Does he think for even one minute of the nearly 5,000 coffins in which the remains of his fellow-citizens lie moldering? The tears of their parents? Their spouses and children? The suffering their families and friends endure, having lost a loved one? The estimated 50,000 or so lying in their own piss in military hospitals or suffering quietly at home? Missing a limb or an organ, struggling to get along on disability payments, homeless? Doomed to a lifetime of fighting the mental and emotional impact of what has been seen and lived through?


And what of the Iraqis who have died by the hundreds of thousands? Does he ever think about, see, respond to, the sight of a pool of blood blackening in the desert sun? Filled with the limbs, separated from their erstwhile owners, of children, housewives, cab-drivers, innocent bystanders, stallholders in the marketplace where the latest atrocity occurred? A little more than two years ago, a Lancet study estimated the number of Iraqi dead at 655,000. UNHCR estimates 4.7 million refugees, both inside and outside Iraq, most in dire need of food, shelter, medical aid.

Does the monster-in-chief ever contemplate the children who have seen their parents blown up before their eyes, the fathers who have no jobs but still must feed their children, the mother whose child burned and stuck to her body when our troops opened fire on her car?


Because, in addition to that first heart-wracking headline, in fact, almost immediately below it, I notice this:

Baghdad blasts kill 19

The Green Zone blast splashed blood and seared flesh across the grey concrete barriers at the entrance, according to an AFP correspondent.

Meanwhile, the rotten thing that wears the mantle of this country's leader announced today that he

believes the Iraq war was a success and is "very pleased" with what is happening there.

[He added] ..."remarkable" progress had been made in Iraq since the late dictator [Saddam Hussein] was toppled in 2003.

"People have been able to take their troops out of Iraq because Iraq is becoming successful. I'm very pleased with what is taking place there now," he said, adding there still is "a lot of work" to be done.

"We are bringing troops home because of the success in Iraq. But Iraq is not yet completely safe.

"So there will be a US presence for a while there at the request of the Iraqi government," he said.

"The United States is willing to continue to help. Most countries there within a very broad coalition have come home but we want to help this government," he said without further elaborating.

Of course, without further elaborating. Either he's lying through his teeth or he, as usual, doesn't have the first fucking clue what he's talking about. He doesn't elaborate on his statements because someone, some very malevolent wretch in the bowels of this misadministration, writes these deliberately disingenuous things for him to say, and he parrots them as his "handlers" tell him to. He has nothing to say about the armless, the legless, the blind and insane, those proud wounded heroes of his money-burning war that is crashing and burning our economy around our ears. Jesus, what a fucking blind, limited, self-satisfied pig he is. A thousand, no, a million curses on his empty head.

Stumble It!

Politics: Mmmm, Peach Mint

My favourite flavour.

You will be happy to hear that House Judiciary Committee Chairman John Conyers of Michigan and Subcommittee Chairwoman Linda Sanchez today displayed their solid steel gonads to the White House. Which were so big, they needed a goddamned wheelbarrow to schlep them!


No, really. Conyers basically told the Gang of Thieves, Crooks, and Liars that they had better get him the documents he had requested, including unredacted FBI reports related to U.S. Attorney Patrick Fitzgerald’s probe into the leak of the identity of CIA agent Valerie Plame. Operative quote:

“Both the rules and our previous oversight activity concerning the Fitzgerald investigation plainly encompass the current inquiry, and the notion that our oversight concerning criminal law enforcement should somehow stop at the gates of the White House has no proper basis.”

Um, YOW? Yowza, yowza, yowza? Been a long time since we heard such ass-kickin' plain talk from the representatives of We The People, yes?

(Pant, pant, pant, gasp)


And as if that wasn't enough, in a further display of gonadal wherewithal, Chairman Conyers and Chairwoman Sanchez went on to tell reptilian slime repository and FAIL-laden human impersonator KKKarl Rove, through his lawyer, that said maggot had better drag his pasty segmented behind before the committee on the date stated or the crack in it might be widened by lawful but forceful means. Operative quote:

“As Committee staff made clear, and as we indicated in our May 1 letter, the proposal that we somehow seek to separate the Siegelman matter from the broader issue of politicization of the Justice Department is unacceptable,” the two lawmakers wrote.

This hearing is related to the important matters of the unlawful prosecution and imprisonment of Governor Siegelman and the politicization of the Department of Justice.

In related news, Dennis Kucinich's Articles of Impeachment are now before the committee, and The Mighty Munchkin of Justice is pressuring the committee to consider them forthwith. If you want impeachment, help Dennis out by letting Conyers and Sanchez, and Dennis, and your Rep know that you support his request and they better get off their ass and review the damn thing. You have 21 days to take these actions. Also please contact all your friends, relatives, neighbours, colleagues, even those who don't support impeachment - the mood of the country is changing, and they may have changed their minds. Operative quote:

The Ohio lawmaker said that it is now “incumbent” for the Judiciary Committee to review evidence he presented. He promised that if the committee failed to hold any hearings on the resolution within thirty days, he would repeat his efforts. He told one reporter Wednesday, “Leadership wants to bury it, but this is one resolution that will be coming back from the dead. … I will be bringing the resolution up again, and I won’t be the only one reading it.”

Don't forget to call, write, or email &mdash or do all three. If at all possible, impeachment may be the one thing that could prevent Winky McMonkeyBrain from starting a third war with Iran.

From the fine folks at ICHC

Given how successful we've been lately in Iraq and Afghanistan, we DO NOT WANT or need to start the next Presidency and Congressional Session tied up in foreign disasters. We have plenty of domestic disasters to deal with. So please, please, please, call, email, and write!

Kucinich has also warned the Judiciary Committee that if they don't get to it post-haste, he's going to present 60 (SIXTY!) articles of impeachment on the next go-round. Please thank him for his efforts. YAY Dennis! You rock! Operative quote:

“The minute the leadership said ‘this is dead on arrival’ I said that I hope they believe in life after death; because I’m coming back with it,” Kucinich vowed in an interview with the Sleuth this week. “It’s not gonna die. Because I’ll come back with more articles. Not 35, but perhaps 60 articles.”

[...]

For Kucinich, impeachment is more than simply a political windmill at which to tilt, he says. It’s about preserving the sanctity of the republic’s founding document.

“What we’re witnessing here,” he says, “is the not-so-slow-moving destruction of our Constittuion.”

Raw Story has the videos, copies of the letters, and more information at each preceding link.

Meanwhile, further displays of courage continue to erupt from other quarters. McClatchy, one of our few actual news organizations left, is reporting that Major General Antonio Taguba, who spoke out against the Bush regime's routine use of torture on detainees, is accusing the Misadministration of war crimes, and calling for those responsible to be held accountable. Operative quote:

"After years of disclosures by government investigations, media accounts and reports from human rights organizations, there is no longer any doubt as to whether the current administration has committed war crimes," Taguba wrote. "The only question that remains to be answered is whether those who ordered the use of torture will be held to account."

Be still, our beating heart! Our collective goddammit beating heart!!

And Amy Goodman over at Democracy Now! tells us that former Senator Mike Gravel is calling for an independent investigation into 9/11 and the prosecution of Stupie O'Stutters and Demon McVampire, otherwise known as our not-at-all-esteemed Leaders.

Dang! It never rains but it pours, yes? Let's hope all these separate actions with a common goal bear the kind of fruit we want &mdash that these criminals receive their just desserts of investigation, impeachment, and imprisonment. Personal Responsibility! The people demand they take some!

These hypocrites and liars were so willing to call for personal responsibility on the part of the sick, the weak, the poor, the suffering, the helpless, the ill and disabled. When it comes to their own responsibility for anything, the only thing they're quick to show is a clean pair of heels. It's time to turn that around now.

Crossposted over at Out of Iraq Bloggers Caucus

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2008 Elections: Telling The Truth

Was it just yesterday? Or the day before? That senile warmonger John McInsane had the big brass balls to tell Barack Obama he was going to instruct Obama about how peaceful Iraq was and how things are going so fucking well in Iraq? Let's see, here's a few pertinent spittle-fleckings:

[...] McCain added, he [Obama, Ed.] will change his position on the war because of the success the U.S. is having there. “Sen. Obama was driven to his conclusion by ideology, not by the facts on the ground,” McCain said. “Success in Iraq is undeniable.”

The Seattle Times responds with an editorial that basically informs McInsane of what everyone else with a working brain cell already knows: the aged, cranky, nasty old Republican nominee is fuller of shit than a constipated cow. A pertinent snippet:

McCain is having a jolly time pretending he is the only candidate with enough cachet and experience to lead the U.S. on military matters, even offering to squire Obama around Iraq.

McCain's posturing would be silly one-upmanship if the costs of the war in Iraq and at home were not so enormous and never-ending. McCain has the wrong position. He supports continued military involvement in Iraq. Obama, more credibly, vows to end the war and bring troops home.

Kudos to the editorial writer! More than two-thirds of the American electorate is utterly sick and tired of this bogus war. Bombing the helpless populace of a small country that has done nothing to us is nothing less than a war crime. A war crime that has, incidentally, destroyed our economy and is threatening the combined economy of the rest of the world.

Does anybody remember the last time McInsane went to Iraq? March of this year. Protected by about 100 Marines, in full body armour, with helicopter gunships overhead, McInsane was photographed (at taxpayers' expense, of course) strolling about in Baghdad, proclaiming it safe. The old geezer conveniently forgot to mention to anyone during his recent spittle-flecked rant that his army escort would not let him go to the Shorja market where he had his picture taken last year, because it was "too unsafe."

Of course, someone who can't tell Sunni from Shi'a and doesn't even know how many troops we have in Iraq is hardly the authority on the war. If only fate wasn't tempted to give the old man the smackdown every time he opens his mouth and switches feet. Pertinent snippet:

McCain's comments about Mosul being "quiet" have also been criticized. On the day he made them, 30 Iraqis were killed by suicide bombings in the Mosul area.

Meanwhile, the town of Hit, near Baghdad, didn't want to be left out of the rush to smear a little egg on the erstwhile candidate's face. A suicide bomber in that town, no doubt having read or heard McLame's comments, rushed off to glory, taking ten people with him and wounding 12 others.

McLame displayed his usual tin ear on the issue:

McCain, speaking to reporters in Milwaukee, refused to acknowledge a mistake, saying that "I said we have drawn down. And we have drawn down."

Gee, where have we heard that refusal to admit making a mistake before? Oh, yeah, the previous two terms of Gee Dumbya Pumpkinhead.

In an attempt to defend the senile warmonger, his advisers said the flap amounted to nothing more than "nitpicking" about "verb tenses."

"It is the essence of semantics," said a frustrated Randy Scheunemann, McCain's top foreign policy adviser, on a conference call organized by the campaign. "We're having this call about a verb tense."

Wow, they sure have learned their lessons well. They're borrowing from the arsenal of Karl Rove and Bill Clinton. Next they're going to tell us what the definition of "is" is. Good work, kids! No, let's rephrase that: Heckuva Job, Johnny!

In other convincing evidence of the peacefulness of Iraq, thousands of Iraqis turned out to protest the U.S. presence. Intelligence (a quality Mr. McInsane seems dreadfully short on) officials announced today that our progress in Iraq basically sucks wet monkey ass. The scheduled elections are already getting the Sunni mad at each other. Progress! Peace! Missing Limbs! Awakening Councils!

Is there anyone in Iraq that we haven't pissed off yet? Well, maybe McInsane's definition of "progress," "success," "drawdown," and so forth are not exactly the same as Merriam-Webster's or Oxford's OED, or, let's be honest, any fucking body else's.

Tell the truth, Mr. McCain. If you remember how that's defined any more, that is. And don't forget to tell all those American servicemen being blown up in Iraq and Afghanistan why you refuse to sign Jim Webb's GI Bill that would give them better benefits than the pile of steaming crap the Bush misadministration's been trying to feed them for the past X years.

Crossposted over at Out of Iraq Bloggers Caucus

Stumble It!

Iraq: Teh Success Is Killing Us

The WahPoo reports that yesterday provided further evidence of success in Iraq. In fact, that particular day in Iraq was so successful that we may not have an army left at all, if each day to come is exactly like that one.

Shoot, we may not have any Iraqis, either. Then we can just mosey on in there and suck up all the oil for our Hummers. According to the article,

Two bombings killed nearly 60 people Tuesday in parts of Iraq where U.S. and Iraqi forces have claimed significant success in combating Sunni insurgent groups.

Just imagine what the death toll might have been like if we weren't that successful.

Bombings took place in Baquba (Diyala province), Mosul, Ramadi (Anbar province), and Baghdad. Some 82 people were wounded, and the carnage inspired one Iraqi spokesman to add to our treasury of unforgettable quotes this particular remark:

"Half of the dead people are still at the Baqubah morgue because it is so hard to identify their bodies," Jassem said.

Being cursed with an overactive imagination, we're currently searching for our psychoactive meds while speculating on just why identification appears to be so elusive. Possibly, the difficulty of identifying a knee or a wrist is greater if it is no longer attached to the person one might know and love.

What a terrible thing this war is. Day after day, our purported "leaders" lie to us, until even the tinpot soldier in charge of the current efforts (since all the better men were forced out for daring to tell the truth about this misadventure) is forced to admit that no corners have been turned, there is no light at the end of the tunnel, and the "last throes" of the insurgents have persisted for three too many long, weary years even as the U.S. Army is in its last throes thanks to the throe-er's friends and cronies accumulating wealth by winning no-bid contracts to give our military insufficient arms and equipment and poisoning them with bad food and dirty water.

Some people are doing something about it. Some very courageous people. Grateful thanks to those of you speaking out against the war.

Crossposted over at Out of Iraq Bloggers' Caucus

Stumble It!

2008 Elections: McInsane and Iraq

Muhannad Fala'ah /Getty Images

John McCain announced today that Iraq is approaching normalcy. What era is he living in? What drugs is he on?

McCain gave a relatively optimistic appraisal of the situation in Iraq, saying that the recent reductions in violence have returned the country to something "approaching normal political and economic life for the average Iraqi."

Before the invasion in 2003, the average Iraqi suffered from the sanctions that were imposed on Iraq, but as a rule, they could go through an entire day, a week, a month &mdash sometimes even a year &mdash without having to pick up pieces of dead relatives, neighbours, or friends.

And, in fact, The Australian reports that rocket attacks today on the Green Zone in Baghdad and a U.S. military base in Baghdad killed 3 U.S. soldiers and injured 31. Correct us if we're wrong, but we were under the impression that it is not considered "normal" to have rocket and mortar attacks on the Green Zone.

Does the mainstream media even pick up on this shit? Here's this doddering old fool who can't tell a Sunni from a Shi'a after five fucking years of war. He's a fucking Senator, fer crisake, not some shit-shoveler in the George W. Bush Memorial Sewage Plant of San Francisco (no offense to shit-shovelers anywhere, but it's not in your job description to know the warring parties in wars your government starts).

He's accusing Iran of training al Qaeda in Iraq fighters. That would be a handy-dandy thing to do, given that Iran is Shi'a and aQI is Sunni and the two sects are as close to mortal enemies as it gets in the Middle East. Someone ought to let the old fool know that aQI is most likely getting its money, guns, and training from Sunni Saudi Arabia, home of the hardline fundie Wahabi school of Islamic thought and good buddies of McCain's old friend George Dubya.

Meanwhile, Jason Linkins writes in the Huffington Post that ambulatory slimebag Patrick McHenry (Repulsive-Nauseating Conman), who recently made a trip to Iraq on the taxpayer dime and called a serviceman a "two-bit security guard" as a way of showing his support for the troops, may have endangered U.S. troops. No doubt as a way of showing his support. Very supportive fellow, McHenry.

Pam's House Blend notes that Rep. McHenry supports sleepovers at his house involving studly young NOT-GAY college students involved in some sort of voting scandal. There's also plenty of sleaze involving gay prostitution, which resulted in some sort of love triangle murder in Florida.

This blog actively supports gay, bisexual, transgender, lesbian, and all-around QUEER folk. But we wonder why so many Republicans appear to be gayer than larks, yet actively working against LGBTQ rights, and so deeply closeted they're pooping hangers. C'mon, boys and girls, step out of your closet and fucking admit to being who and what you are. No crime, no sin, no shame. It's natural to love whoever your heart tells you to love.

It's not natural to cement the goddamn closet door shut and hate on everyone who refuses to climb in there with you. But his gayishly gay gayness scandals aside, Patrick McHenry may have done a Very Bad Thing, recently. According to Brandon Friedman of VoteVets:

"Only two days after McHenry promoted a video of himself in the Green Zone describing in detail the effectiveness of the rocket attacks on Easter Sunday," Friedman notes, "the area was hit with a barrage that killed two U.S. soldiers and wounded 17 others." Friedman goes on to assert, "The bottom line is that whoever launched that strike could take the information McHenry provided and use it to kill Americans in the Green Zone."

Friedman is far from alone in his concern:

On Saturday, I communicated with one military officer currently in the Green Zone who stated that this was "undoubtedly a violation of OPSEC." On Sunday evening, I spoke with a senior intelligence official in Washington who seemed dumbfounded by McHenry's remarks. Asked whether he considered this a breach of operations security, the official shouted over the phone at me, "Of course! He's helping to dial them in." He meant the people firing the rockets.

It looks like the Republican definition of "support the troops" is "Encourage the dumb fucks to sign up and put their bodies on the line if Der Leader starts a war. Cut vet benefits; if soldiers get injured in the line of duty, force them to pay back any signup bonuses; give military contracts to your buddies so they get rich giving the troops inferior gear; buy lots of yellow plastic magnets made in China or Kazakhstan; yell loudly anytime anyone points out that you're not really helping the troops at all." Very supportive.

Oh, yeah, and work hard to get some senile warmonger elected even as your own country is falling apart because all the money is being funneled into some tiny poor country that never did anything to you and your'n.

We gotta make sure that John McCain doesn't come with an arm's-length of the Presidency; and we gotta kick out of office all these liars, thugs, crooks, and thieves who purport to support while actively harming the military.

In other exciting news, USA Toady (no typo) is reporting that the number of military recruits requiring "conduct" waivers has tripled in the past four years. Great. Find a felon, sign them up, give them weapons training, teach them might is right. Expose them to ongoing physical and psychological trauma, then bring them home and let them loose on the population.

Oh, yeah, most of these people are guilty of "misdemeanors." That means that they were merely setting markers on the road to more disturbed conduct. So it's OK. Just like Pfc Greene, who raped and murdered Abeer Qasim Hamza al-Janabi, killed her entire family, and set all their bodies on fire to destroy the evidence of his criminal acts.

Stumble It!

Iraq: How Many Times

Does Nouri al-Maliki need his ass kicked really hard before he learns his lesson?

This is a question that will undoubtedly be resolved sometime before he either absconds with all the billions we've been pouring into Iraq (no doubt largely funnelled directly into his, and his cronies', unnumbered Swiss bank accounts) or meets a hideous end when he proves to be too much of a liability to either the Dawa Party (his party) or the fragile coalition of Dawa/SCIRI (or Islamic Supreme Council of Iraq, ISCI, as it's calling itself these days) and whatever else is coalitioning with these thugs.

We didn't post about al-Maliki's recent primate-like posturing and associated blunders because it was all so deeply depressing and predictable. Why bother? It was obvious from the conflation of Cheney's "visit" to the ME and the revelation that he did not really discuss oil prices with the House of Saud followed by the chest-beating and rump displaying of teh Maliki that Sadr was going to have to kick his baboonlike ass but good just to keep the dumb motherfucker from overreaching.

To recap, a chronology of events:

• March 17, three days before the anniversary of the invasion of Iraq: Cheney flies into Iraq unannounced, meets with al-Maliki
  
  
• March 21, Cheney meets with King Abdullah of Saudi Arabia
  
  
• March 22, Cheney announces through a myrmidon that the only relief in terms of oil prices will come from drilling in America's remaining pristine wildernesses, in other words, thanks America for funding my junket on which I took my wife and daughter and we went fishing in Oman on March 19th, and fuck you very much on oil prices.
  
  
• March 26, Nouri al-Maliki issues his famous "ultimatum" to Iraqi "militias."
  
  Who are these Iraqi militias? Right now, Iraq is controlled by various hardline Islamic Shi'a factions, including al-Maliki's Dawa party, which has the Iraqi Army functioning as its own militia; SCIRI/Islamic Supreme Council of Iraq (ISCI) which has its own militia; and Hojatoleslam Moqtada al-Sadr's Jaish al-Mahdi.
  
  For the benefit of the apparently senile or terminally stupid John McCain, elderly and doddering presidential candidate, we would like to point out here that al-Qaeda in Iraq (aQI) is a Sunni Muslim organization, with no friendly ties at all with the warring Shi'a militias. Also that al-Maliki's Dawa party is very friendly with the rulers of Iran - so friendly that they greeted that nation's president, Ahmedi Najad, with flowers and parades and marching bands when he recently visited &mdash unlike our leaders, who, despite paying nearly one trillion fucking dollars of our money for the privilege, must sneak into Iraq under cover of darkness and cannot even travel to the fucking market without fully armed squads of bodyguards, full body armour, and air cover.
  
  Nouri al-Maliki was apparently targeting al-Sadr's Jaish al-Mahdi with this crackdown. He called them "worse than al-Qaeda," the Sunni terrorist organization. Apparently, to al-Maliki, al-Sadr's challenge to his Prime Ministership is worse than the terrorist strikes around the world that have killed thousands of American, British, Spanish, Iraqi, Pakistani, and other peoples. Nice to know one's allies' priorities, Mr. Cheney. al-Maliki gave the JAM three days to lay down their arms and personally flew to Basra to supervise the extermination of JAM.
  
  
• March 28, three days later, when it was pretty obvious that JAM was beating the living shit out of the Iraqi army, with Iraqi police turning over arms and equipment to JAM in Baghdad and Basra, al-Maliki "extended" the deadline to ten days.
  
  Despite all the guns and uniforms and training we have given the Iraqi Army, you can't buy loyalty and you can't buy a will to fight. JAM fights because they want control of Iraq and they believe they will be rewarded with political power or houris in paradise regardless of whether they live or die. The Iraqi Army fights because it's a job in a country with staggering unemployment rates and few other ways of making money, and at least they can feed their families. Whose motivation do you think is greater?
  
  Despite the full strength of the U.S. Army as backup & despite 160,000 or so American and British fighters with top-flight military equipment, including air strike capability, al-Maliki was forced to put lipstick on the pig of his claim that he would fight the Shi'a militias to the end. He had to beg for the help of his Iranian masters to end the conflict.
  
  
• March 31, al-Sadr graciously extends the olive branch of peace &mdash along with a nine-point statement demanding the release of various of his supporters who have been arrested but not accused of any crime, and an end to attacks on his forces.
  
  
• April 1, Nouri al-Maliki announces that the military operation in Basra has been a success. Obviously, he's smoking the same thing as Bush.
  
  Five hundred Iraqis were killed in the fighting. al-Maliki is asking al-Sadr to "please return" the 50 armored vehicles and government cars that JAM took. Two Americans were also killed, and rocket and mortar attacks carried out on the "fortresslike, secure" Green Zone, where the American Embassy is located.
  
  
• April 03, we learn that Nouri al-Maliki is a masochist with a fetish for ass-kicking &mdash as long as he is the kickee. Nouri, my man, we had no idea you were such a BOTTOM!
  
  Even as Hojatoleslam Moqtada al-Sadr is calling for nationwide protests to mark the anniversary of the U.S. toppling Saddam (April 9), al-Maliki is planning to enter Sadr City and other JAM strongholds. Is he trying to get the nascent Iraqi Army wiped out? Or is this an attempt to force continuing American and British involvement in the war?

Already the drawdown of "surge" troops has been halted and the British have announced that they will not pull out the 4,000 remaining troops in Basra. Not that the British troops are very effective, since they're all hiding out at the airport, and who can blame them. They must be tired of being used for target practice.

As for American troops &mdash people, if you have friends and relatives over there who were supposed to come back anytime soon, you can just kiss that goodbye. They may never come back at all, except in a body bag, if George keeps letting al-Maliki play soldiers using our forces. Is that what your friends and relatives signed up for? To be the pawns of an idiot who persists in playing with other people's lives and doesn't have the first clue about military strategy?

Meanwhile, you will no doubt be thrilled to your very toenails to hear that Chimpy McAWOL, who managed to weasel out of serving in any capacity except possibly National Buffoon, is paying no attention whatsoever to the restarting of the meatgrinder. Nope, he's busy trying to create a "legacy" or something, at the taxpayers' expense, somewhere in the former Soviet Union.

REUTERS/Francois Lenoir

Clue: They're not laughing with you, George.

Stumble It!

Iraq: The Successifying

Chimpy McDimwit has just given an interview to the Times of London in which he claims that the violence now erupting in Iraq is "a very positive moment in the development of a sovereign nation that is willing to take on elements that believe they are beyond the law."

That violence includes fighting raging in Kut, where some 42 people have already died and over 100 have been wounded; Baghdad, where Iraqi authorities have imposed a curfew from 11 p.m. Thursday to 5 a.m. Sunday after hundreds of thousands of people marched in the streets against Maliki's government setting off days of clashes between government troops and Shiite Muslim militia fighters &mdash leading a Canadian newspaper to speculate that the militias that support the various factions of the Iraqi government are trying to eliminate smaller factions before the coming elections. U.S. Embassy workers in Iraq have been told to remain in secure buildings. Two Americans have died in the attacks so far; Hilla, Karbala, and Diwaniya; and Basra, where Nouri al-Maliki has personally showed up to posture right before he gets his ass kicked all the way back to the Green Zone. Incidentally, multiple rocket attacks are taking place inside the "secure fortress" of the Green Zone, indicating that perhaps it is neither as secure nor as fortress-like as the morons in charge and their sycophants in the press would have us believe.

In Basra, police chief Major General Abdul Jalil Khalaf survived a suicide car bomb attack around 1:00 am on Thursday (2200 GMT Wednesday) in which three policemen were killed.

The International Committee of the Red Cross put the toll from the Basra clashes at 20 dead but other, unconfirmed reports said 40 were killed. Altogether, about 130 are reported killed and hundreds injured. Saboteurs have also blown up a key oil pipeline, which Iraqi authorities estimate will take approximately 72 hours to repair. Needless to say, this has sent oil prices back up again.

In addition, gunmen have kidnapped Tahseen Sheikhly, a spokesman for the Baghdad security plan launched in February 2007 to stabilize the capital. Sheikhly has appeared frequently at news conferences alongside U.S. officials. The abduction occurred in the afternoon, according to officials in the Interior Ministry. The attackers shot and wounded at least one of Sheikhly's guards and ransacked his home before fleeing with him.

Mr Bush, who had spent the morning being briefed on Iraq by the Pentagon before an imminent announcement on US troop levels, said that despite “substantial gains” since the US military surge began last year, much work was needed to “maintain the success we’ve had”.

During his interview with the Times, Bush disparaged those who want US troops to come home, and reinforced his power, saying as he has before, "I'm commander in chief."

He averred that decisions would not be made by those who “scream the loudest” in calling for troops to come home.

“I understand people here want us to leave, regardless of the situation," he said, "but that will not happen so long as I’m Commander-In-Chief.”

How long before Drunky McCokespoon goes back to chopping brush in Crawford and leaves the rest of the world in peace?

Stumble It!

Bring The Troops Home NOW!

Well. Isn't that just ducky? Raw Story tells us that, after reviewing hundreds of thousands of captured Iraqi documents, the Pentagon has found no evidence that Saddam Hussein had any connection at al with al-Qaeda.

Apparently, the only links between Saddam and any terrorist groups were just like ours. Just as we funded and armed Osama bin Laden to wage Islamic Jihad against the Russians when they invaded Afghanistan in support of Babrak Kamal's government, Saddam Hussein funded and armed groups to attack "Iraqi exiles, Shiite Muslims, Kurds and others he considered enemies of his regime."

The study is due to Congress and for general release by midweek.

The article, penned by Warren Strobel of McClatchy's Washington Bureau, states, in part:

[...] the upcoming Pentagon report promises to be a particularly stark and thorough refutation of one of the primary Bush administration arguments for the invasion of Iraq [i.e., that Saddam Hussein was linked to al-Qaeda. Another Bush Misadministration argument, that Saddam had weapons of mass destruction, has already been thoroughly refuted.] The subsequent war has come at the cost of hundreds of thousands of Iraqi lives, nearly 4,000 US troop deaths, and some half a trillion US dollars and counting.

Mr. Strobel's math skills are poor &mdash or perhaps McClatchy prefers to err on the cautious side of the balance ledger. Current wisdom has it that the total cost of Shrubya's Little Misadventure will run to over three trillion dollars. These costs do not address the Iraqis we've maimed and wounded, or the bills that other countries foolish enough to join in the "coalition of the willing" face. Britain, for example, announced today that their estimated cost will total approximately ten billion pounds sterling.

The article adds that the Bush Misadministration continues to lie about Saddam's Iraq and al-Qaeda, despite previously released documents and reports indicating the same findings as the forthcoming extensive review. As recently as last April, Vice President Dick Cheney again asserted a link between the Iraqi dictator and the terror network. So, if you know anyone stupid enough to listen to them and believe, please buy a copy of the review when it is released and use it to beat some sense into them.

The study is entitled "Saddam and Terrorism: Emerging Insights from Captured Iraqi Documents." Although it has been essentially complete since last year, it has been undergoing what one U.S. intelligence official described as a "painful" declassification review.

The article notes, in a painful aside, that "In fact, al Qaida in Iraq didn't emerge until 2004, a year after the invasion." Was that before or after Commander Codpiece was strutting around on the deck of an aircraft carrier in a uniform before a banner that screamed "Mission Accomplished," to the collective spooging of the shameless press corps?

Photo montage from grupo-utopia.com with the request that you spread it around

Meanwhile, we note that almost exactly a month ago, Auntie Beeb published a piece about the "reverse surge" that appears to be grimly prophetic. That article was pointing out the increase in violent incidents, many of which seemed to be targeting the Sunnis that the U.S. has been wooing with large sums of money:

US commanders on the ground [...] have pumped money into local economies by employing tens of thousands of young Sunni men as local auxiliaries - now re-named "Sons of Iraq" after several unhappier titles such as "Concerned Local Citizens" - to act as the eyes and ears of the US and Iraqi troops in the struggle against the militants.

They are also trying to encourage the Baghdad government to be more proactive in providing services and job-creation schemes in areas where the insurgents have been driven out.

But as we, and many others, have pointed out, the war has been going on for five years at this point. It's a bit late to start trying to win "hearts and minds." What's more, as the U.S. military strategy in Vietnam might suggest, the buying over of the "Sons of Iraq" sounds suspiciously like Tricky Dick's "changing the color of the corpses."

Al-Qaeda, and those Iraqis who are fighting the U.S. military will treat as traitors any Iraqis who side with the U.S. military. The U.S. is not going to stay in Iraq forever, John McCain or no John McCain. We simply cannot afford to. Sooner or later, our internal economic straits will be so dire, as a result of siphoning money out of the country to fund a prolonged war, that our economy will collapse. The U.S. is not willing to accept Iraqi refugees in any significant number. Despite the fact that more than 4 million Iraqis are now refugees, either in their own country or in Syria, Jordan, and other neighbouring nations, only approximately 7,000 have been accepted into the U.S. to date, and the original target of 25,000 has been lowered to 7,000.

Besides, the "hearts and minds" that the U.S. military is trying to win are deeply split even among themselves. We've said this repeatedly: Iraq has always been a fractured, heterogenous nation, with many different ethnic and religious groups, divided loyalties, in many ways still adhering to family, clan, tribe and feudal notions of society.

Thus, it should come as no surprise that Auntie Beeb once again informed us just yesterday that a woman had detonated her explosive vest when she came calling on a Son of Iraq. Chances are that, just like the Issawi celebrants mentioned in the previous link, the woman was either a member of the tribe of the slain "Son of Iraq," Thaer Ghadban al-Karkhi.

According to Auntie Beeb, Al Karkhi was the head of one of the majority-Sunni Arab Awakening Councils, allied with the US military against al-Qaeda in Iraq. How true that is, we have to wonder, since the same piece identified "Sheikh" Abdul Sattar Abu Risha as the head of the Awakening Council in Anbar, a key US ally who was widely credited with having defeated al-Qaeda in much of western Iraq. Greg Palast can give you the lowdown on the "Sheikh."

We ourselves have blogged about the "Sheikh's" mysterious trips with U.S. money. $75 million worth, fellow-taxpayers.

Meanwhile, to add further credence to Auntie Beeb's prognostications, Raw Story is telling us that forty-two people died in Iraq today as the result of violence. Forty-two. Do you know forty-two people? Add up your family members. You might have to include a few neighbours or colleagues.

Now imagine that these people who you, maybe, love, or like, or just know, were blown to smithereens. An assemblage of body parts, bloody meat, barely recognizable as human. Now imagine that happens to you every day. You probably don't know enough people to sustain that kind of loss every day for a year, probably not even a month. Well, for the Iraqis, this has been going on for five long years. And some days, it's a lot more than forty-two people.

In other news, eight U.S. servicemen were also killed. When are we going to bring our troops home? Because this has gone on too damned long. The troops did the job they were sent there to do. An army's job is to fight. They fought. The other stuff has to be done by non-military qualified and experienced civilian personnel. But Boy George wanted to send his friends and cronies out there to bilk the taxpayer, and because they're the friends and cronies of an incompetent boob, to no one's surprise they too are incompetent boobs. So now we have a failed state, in which people are being killed every day in large numbers. And it's too dangerous to send qualified experienced civilian personnel out there to help to fix the mess we made.

Every day that the soldiers stay there is one more day that they present a target to a people furious that their country has been invaded, their jobs are gone, their economy is faltering, they don't have power or light or working telephones, their streets are unsafe, and their wives, sisters, mothers, and daughters are being raped and beaten and killed, while their sons, brothers, fathers, and husbands are kidnapped, tortured, and killed. Get them out NOW. Bring them home.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, articles like this are just beginning to show up on the radar. The article states that railcars due to ease congestion in Philadelphia will be delayed. See if you can guess why.

New SEPTA Regional Rail cars will be at least four months late, delaying relief for riders on the increasingly crowded rail lines, SEPTA officials said yesterday.

[...] delivery of the rest of the 120-car order will also be pushed back at least four months, Nowakowski said. Final delivery of all the railcars is now scheduled for October 2010.

Rotem [the company building the cars, Ed.] was unable to procure enough of the type of steel specified in the SEPTA contract because the U.S. government has cornered the market; it is using the steel for armoring vehicles bound for Iraq, Nowakowski said.

For the sake of the dying, dead, maimed and wounded, in Iraq and at home; for the sake of the faltering economy, the people losing their homes, the people without health care, or with inadequate care; for the sake of the families that are being fractured by the stresses of this war; for the sake of the nation that is tottering under the accumulation of debt and the loss of its sons and daughters &mdash bring them home. End the war now.

Stumble It!

Iraq: Well, There Goes The Neighbourhood

Watch.

Photo from NorthernLights blog

The WaPoo tells us this morning that the Sunni forces that we created with large amounts of taxpayer money, are "losing patience" with us.

So we go to this country, right? And we bomb it and kill a bunch of people and all that. Then we decide that the Sunni, because they belong to the same faction, sect, whatever, of Islam as the leader of that country (Saddam Hussein) are the enemy, right? So we get most of them kicked out of their jobs, and we arrest lots of them, and we throw them into our jails, where we torture them. And this goes on for, oh, FOUR FUCKING YEARS.

Then we figure we've made a mistake, but it's kinda late in the game for that because, guess what, we've been pouring money into the pockets of the Shi'a leaders for FOUR FUCKING YEARS by now, and they're all busy fighting among themselves and with each other and really happy that the Sunni are gone, because that means more of the higher pie for them, right?

But some bright spark figures out that even though we kicked them out of their jobs and their homes and neighbourhoods, and forced them to flee across the country leaving everything behind and live like refugees in their own country, or even become honest-to-God refugees in some other country except ours, because we don't want them over here, and even though we raped some of their teenage daughters and killed them and stuff, they'll still be our friends if we GIVE! THEM! MONEY! Right?

And now they're "losing patience." Why for? Why for you so impatient, you stupid sandn*****s? So we fucked up your economy and killed your relatives, and the big pool of sewage we created in your capital city can be viewed via GoogleEarth. So what? So you lost your job and your cousin lost his leg and your sister lost her life and your uncle lost his house. So fucking what? We're giving you money, ain't we? So what if we're giving you cholera too?

Yesterday, we put up a post on this site complete with a map of Iraq, as we questioned whether our "leaders" had any kind of fucking plan for our friends, relatives, and neighbours that they've thrown into the meatgrinder of Iraq. Today, we ask you to examine that map closely &mdash reproducing it here for your convenience &mdash as we list the areas where Sunni fighters, now armed by us, are leaving whatever bogus organization we set up incorporating them in order to look good to American politicians and the people who believe their lies.



According to the article, since February 8th &mdash less than three weeks ago &mdash thousands of fighters in Diyala province have left their posts; their leaders have since warned that the fighters would disband completely unless their demands were met. Here's a snippet outlining some of their demands:

in Diyala, one of the major battlegrounds in the U.S. fight against al-Qaeda in Iraq. Awakening groups, also known here as Popular Committees, are demanding the resignation of the Shiite provincial police chief, Maj. Gen. Ghanem al-Qureishi. They accuse him of running death squads and torturing Sunnis, allegations that Qureishi denied in an interview.

It's practically a given that some Sunni during Saddam Hussein's time ran death squads and tortured Shi'a Iraqis. It's also a given, knowing human hearts, that some Shi'a, having taken power, are now revenging themselves on hapless Sunni. The U.S. military is not capable of dealing with this. A military is a tool designed to kill and break people. It is not designed to resolve conflict, only to make it not worthwhile for that conflict to be turned against itself or whatever it's protecting. So there is no plan and no group that is tasked with resolving these very serious issues. Therefore, things can only get worse.

Meanwhile, fighters in Babil province refuse to work for the U.S. after U.S. military fired on them, killing some 19 fighters and injuring approximately 12 others.

Because you have eyes and know how to use them, we don't even have to tell you that Diyala province and Babil province almost completely surround the city of Baghdad and effectually bar our escape route to the south, not to mention the supply lines that come up from the south.

The circumstances of the clash are in dispute. The article states, in part:

The predominantly Sunni Awakening forces, referred to by the U.S. military as the Sons of Iraq or Concerned Local Citizens, are made up mostly of former insurgents who have turned against extremists because of their harsh tactics and interpretation of Islam. The U.S. military pays many fighters roughly $10 a day to guard and patrol their areas. Thousands more unpaid volunteers have joined out of tribal and regional fealties.

This article is written in part by Sudarshan Raghavan, the same journalist who wrote a piece we quoted in a previous blog post. At that time, we were, to put it mildly, concerned that Mr. Raghavan, who has reported extensively on Iraq, did not seem to notice that we were arming people who had every reason in the world to hate us and want revenge on us.

Now we have to ask what the phrase "former insurgents who have turned against extremists because of their harsh tactics and interpretation of Islam" means. We know that the Sunni, for good reason, formed a large part of the insurgency (you would too if people were kicking you out of your house and job and occupying your country and raping your sister).

Given that these Sunni Sons of Whatever to whom we have now handed guns, ammo, and money are now using our ordinance against the supposed "al Qaeda in Iraq," we venture to opine that they're probably indulging in some pretty harsh tactics themselves. If they were part of the insurgency before, they were no stranger to harsh tactics. We really don't believe that they're inviting their erstwhile enemies over for tea, bikkies, and a civilized discourse on the benefits of laying down their arms. And what about this "interpretation of Islam" business? Are we talking about different sects here, or what?

And what about the al-Janabi, one of the largest and most powerful tribes of the Sunni? What about the fact that the Sunni formed most of Hussein's military and police?

The article goes on to say:

Some U.S. military officials say they are growing concerned that the Sunni insurgent group al-Qaeda in Iraq has infiltrated Awakening forces in some areas.

"Now, there is no cooperation with the Americans," said Haider Mustafa al-Kaisy, an Awakening commander in Baqubah, the capital of Diyala province, an insurgent stronghold that U.S. and Iraqi forces are still struggling to control. "We have stopped fighting al-Qaeda."

Yah. I'd be worrying too.

Another Son in the oil-rich city of Baiji adds:

His men also have not received their salaries in two months, he said. "We'll all be patient for another two months. If nothing changes, then we'll suspend and quit," Kassim said. "Then we'll go back to fighting the Americans."

Is anybody in charge of this Keystone Kops operation? Does their right hand know in whose pants the left hand is currently residing? And look at the Father of our Sons in the south:

Sabah al-Janabi, who heads the Awakening in the area, publicly criticized the U.S. military, alleging it had killed 19 of his men in the past 45 days, which U.S. commanders deny.

We're not accusing Sabah al-Janabi of anything. He may well be the most loyal (to the U.S. or to our puppet regime) of Sunni fighters. We're just pointing out that this conflict is an impossible one. The people who like us and the people who hate us look alike, belong to the same tribe, possibly even the same religious faction. This was what drove men mad in Vietnam. They were sent there to fight an enemy, but unlike, say, Star Trek episodes, the bad guys didn't wear black hats. Sometimes little kids threw grenades at you. Sometimes sweet old grannies tried to kill you. And they looked just exactly like the little kids who were just sweet little kids caught up in a horrible war, or the sweet old grannies who might laugh and joke with you and do your laundry or fix your food.

So in the end you started killing people indiscriminately because you really didn't know if or when some of them were going to try to kill you.

Meanwhile, the Soldiers of Heaven have apparently not been inactive. They resurfaced recently in Dhi Qar and Basra provinces.

In the town of Iskandiriyah, in Babil province, a suicide bomber has killed some 63 members of Al-Sayyid Moqtada al-Sadr's followers who were on a pilgrimage to the holy city of Karbala to commemorate the Iraqi holy day of Arbaeen.

In northern Iraq, the Turkish military is continuing to bomb suspected PKK hideouts, destroying bridges and killing Kurdish civilians with impunity thanks to intelligence provided by the Pentagon. The Kurds, who consider themselves pro-American and U.S. allies, have been begging the U.S. for help.

The prime minister of the Kurdistan Regional Government, Nechirvan Barzani, expressed concern that the Turkish operation had gone beyond targeting the PKK and was harming civilians and the economy of northern Iraq. He said he was particularly concerned that Turkey had destroyed at least three bridges near the border.

This is the son of President Massoud Barzani speaking. Hitherto the Northern Kurdish region has been the only stable one in Iraq.

Meanwhile, in our other clusterfuck over in Afghanistan, the AP tells us things are looking fairly grim.

Director of National Intelligence Michael McConnell told the Senate Armed Services Committee that the resurgent Taliban controls 10 percent to 11 percent of the country and Karzai's government controls 30 percent to 31 percent. But more than six years after the U.S. invasion to oust the Taliban and establish a stable central government, the majority of Afghanistan's population remains under local tribal control, he said.

Let's translate this, shall we? The government of U.S. puppet Hamid Karzai, shored up with the military might of NATO and the U.S. armed forces, after six long years, controls only the cities. In the countryside, the Taliban roam freely, and the various tribal elders throw their allegiance to whichever side is not actively killing them this week.

Well, at least the British might be moving towards throwing that other toadying lickspittle and assistant junior bottlewashing war criminal, Tony Blair, into a well-deserved cell in some prison. Pity it can't be Abu Ghraib.

Stumble It!

Iraq: More Success

Damn, we gotta quit successin' so much, it's startin' to hurt.

Raw Story tells us that U.S. troops in Iraq have fired on Sunni allies, killing three people. The troops claim that the Sunni group "mistakenly" fired on them first, and they returned fire. This is the third such incident within the past month. A total of 19 Sunni "allies" have been killed, and 12 others injured.

Let's see now, originally we invaded Iraq because Saddam Hussein, a Sunni Muslim, was a "brutal dictator" (aided, of course, by U.S. taxpayer monies, and pictures of him shaking hands with Donald Rumsfeld around the time that he received several tons of nerve gas that he used on Kurdish Iraqis are freely available on teh Googlez).


So we were on the side of the Kurds and freedom and against Saddam Hussein, even though we gave him money and weapons to kill Kurds. Got that. 911!!

Saddam Hussein favoured his Sunni Muslim brethren and even though they are a minority (by a small margin) of Iraqi Arabs, they got the best jobs, etc. So when we invaded, we sided with the Shia Muslim Arab Iraqi majority and helped them to kick a bunch of Sunni Muslims out of power. Got that.

But that didn't work out so good, because the Sunni Muslims who were in power when Saddam was around were mostly just your average yob, trying to work and feed their families, and they got kinda pissed off that their erstwhile neighbours were taking over their houses and kicking them out of their jobs, so they started fighting back. So the insurgency was largely a Sunni insurgency, although Donald Rumsfeld said we shouldn't call it an insurgency at all. Got that.

Meanwhile, the Kurds were, like, our friends and everything, because Saddam Hussein had used (our) nerve gas and other weapons (paid for by our dollars) to kill them. So even though we encouraged them to rebel against Saddam Hussein during the First Gulf War, and then left and Saddam Hussein got to bomb the crap out of them, they're still our friends. Got that.

So while the Sunnis were biting holes in our collective ass, it didn't help that Moqtada al-Sadr and his Shia followers who had fought Hussein for decades were being totally ignored by the U.S. in cobbling together a puppet government. So they started taking bites out too. Then the Shia "governmental" factions &mdash SCIRI (now SIIC), Da'wa, and Fadhila parties, all retrograde Islamic theocratic parties who dream of establishing a Shia Caliphate &mdash started fighting each other for control of Iraq's oil, and were not above attacking U.S. military personnel. But waitaminnit, they're supposed to be teh good guyz, even if they are "Islamofascimunists." OK, got that.

Then it turned out that having an armed Sunni insurgency killing, oh, around FOUR THOUSAND U.S. military while we were successfully occupying their peaceful country in which over 1 million civilians have been killed, 4-5 million others displaced and turned into refugees fleeing for their lives, and perhaps another 2 million wounded, crippled, and otherwise maimed, was not such a great idea. And we should try to make friends with these "insurgents," and win them over to our side. So we gave them a bunch of money, guns, and bombs so they would be our friends and stop fighting each other and fight "al Qaeda" which doesn't seem to be such a big player among all the numerous factions out in Iraq, and in fact seems to be headquartered in our other big success, Afghanistan, where it's causing trouble with our friends the Pakistanis. Got that.

Meanwhile, some of our soldiers decided it would be fun to stalk, rape, and murder a teenage Iraqi girl, so they did. And they murdered her whole family, and set fire to the bodies so no one would know that the girl had been gang-raped and murdered. Except it turned out that the girl &mdash Abeer Qasim Hamza &mdash is a member of one of the biggest and most powerful Sunni tribes, the al-Janabi. Um, oopsie. So is it true, like people say, that in the Near Eastern countries, tribal loyalties mean a great deal? Like, you know, people named al-Janabi, or belonging to the al-Janabi tribe might, maybe, hold a grudge against American military because some of their people raped a member of their tribe?

Then our NATO partner, Turki, was getting kinda annoyed because the Kurdish PKK guerillas, who are fighting for a united Kurdistan, were blowing up stuff in Turki (which has a significant Kurdish minority population), and then retreating across the border into Kurdish areas of Iraq. So, even though the Kurds are! our! friends!, we started secretly giving intelligence on Kurdish PKK hideouts in Iraq to our Turkish friends! who promptly bombed the shit out of the Kurds. Who are our friends.

Damn, all this successful successin' is just too fucking confusing for us. There must be somebody out there who can figure out just who the fuck our friends are and who our enemies are in this unholy mess.

Meanwhile, in other late-breaking news, a woman suicide bomber has blown herself up in a Baghdad shopping mall; a suicide bomber killed 80 people in the southern Afghani town of Kandahar; and the Pentagon states that there will be more U.S. troops in Iraq after the "drawdown" (huh?).

And Bush's friend, Prince Bandar of the House of Saud (whose country generously supplied 15 of the 19 terrorists responsible for the September 11th attacks on the U.S.), has been doing some stenchful deals for military might with U.K. companies, and threatening the UK with terrorist attacks if they investigate bribes that were paid to him.


The Boston Globe tells us that the Saudi government provided the September 11th terrorists with financial and logistics support in their quest to destroy the Twin Towers. While the New Yorker (Seymour Hersh, the most trusted name in news) tells us that the Saudi government has given a great deal of financial support to Osama bin Laden and al Qaeda. Why is the Bush family personal friends with these people? Isn't it treason to befriend people who carry out or finance a military attack on your country?

Stumble It!

Iraq: More Success

Damn, we gotta quit successin' so much, it's startin' to hurt.

Raw Story tells us that U.S. troops in Iraq have fired on Sunni allies, killing three people. The troops claim that the Sunni group "mistakenly" fired on them first, and they returned fire. This is the third such incident within the past month. A total of 19 Sunni "allies" have been killed, and 12 others injured.

Let's see now, originally we invaded Iraq because Saddam Hussein, a Sunni Muslim, was a "brutal dictator" (aided, of course, by U.S. taxpayer monies, and pictures of him shaking hands with Donald Rumsfeld around the time that he received several tons of nerve gas that he used on Kurdish Iraqis are freely available on teh Googlez).


So we were on the side of the Kurds and freedom and against Saddam Hussein, even though we gave him money and weapons to kill Kurds. Got that. 911!!

Saddam Hussein favoured his Sunni Muslim brethren and even though they are a minority (by a small margin) of Iraqi Arabs, they got the best jobs, etc. So when we invaded, we sided with the Shia Muslim Arab Iraqi majority and helped them to kick a bunch of Sunni Muslims out of power. Got that.

But that didn't work out so good, because the Sunni Muslims who were in power when Saddam was around were mostly just your average yob, trying to work and feed their families, and they got kinda pissed off that their erstwhile neighbours were taking over their houses and kicking them out of their jobs, so they started fighting back. So the insurgency was largely a Sunni insurgency, although Donald Rumsfeld said we shouldn't call it an insurgency at all. Got that.

Meanwhile, the Kurds were, like, our friends and everything, because Saddam Hussein had used (our) nerve gas and other weapons (paid for by our dollars) to kill them. So even though we encouraged them to rebel against Saddam Hussein during the First Gulf War, and then left and Saddam Hussein got to bomb the crap out of them, they're still our friends. Got that.

So while the Sunnis were biting holes in our collective ass, it didn't help that Moqtada al-Sadr and his Shia followers who had fought Hussein for decades were being totally ignored by the U.S. in cobbling together a puppet government. So they started taking bites out too. Then the Shia "governmental" factions &mdash SCIRI (now SIIC), Da'wa, and Fadhila parties, all retrograde Islamic theocratic parties who dream of establishing a Shia Caliphate &mdash started fighting each other for control of Iraq's oil, and were not above attacking U.S. military personnel. But waitaminnit, they're supposed to be teh good guyz, even if they are "Islamofascimunists." OK, got that.

Then it turned out that having an armed Sunni insurgency killing, oh, around FOUR THOUSAND U.S. military while we were successfully occupying their peaceful country in which over 1 million civilians have been killed, 4-5 million others displaced and turned into refugees fleeing for their lives, and perhaps another 2 million wounded, crippled, and otherwise maimed, was not such a great idea. And we should try to make friends with these "insurgents," and win them over to our side. So we gave them a bunch of money, guns, and bombs so they would be our friends and stop fighting each other and fight "al Qaeda" which doesn't seem to be such a big player among all the numerous factions out in Iraq, and in fact seems to be headquartered in our other big success, Afghanistan, where it's causing trouble with our friends the Pakistanis. Got that.

Meanwhile, some of our soldiers decided it would be fun to stalk, rape, and murder a teenage Iraqi girl, so they did. And they murdered her whole family, and set fire to the bodies so no one would know that the girl had been gang-raped and murdered. Except it turned out that the girl &mdash Abeer Qasim Hamza &mdash is a member of one of the biggest and most powerful Sunni tribes, the al-Janabi. Um, oopsie. So is it true, like people say, that in the Near Eastern countries, tribal loyalties mean a great deal? Like, you know, people named al-Janabi, or belonging to the al-Janabi tribe might, maybe, hold a grudge against American military because some of their people raped a member of their tribe?

Then our NATO partner, Turki, was getting kinda annoyed because the Kurdish PKK guerillas, who are fighting for a united Kurdistan, were blowing up stuff in Turki (which has a significant Kurdish minority population), and then retreating across the border into Kurdish areas of Iraq. So, even though the Kurds are! our! friends!, we started secretly giving intelligence on Kurdish PKK hideouts in Iraq to our Turkish friends! who promptly bombed the shit out of the Kurds. Who are our friends.

Damn, all this successful successin' is just too fucking confusing for us. There must be somebody out there who can figure out just who the fuck our friends are and who our enemies are in this unholy mess.

Meanwhile, in other late-breaking news, a woman suicide bomber has blown herself up in a Baghdad shopping mall; a suicide bomber killed 80 people in the southern Afghani town of Kandahar; and the Pentagon states that there will be more U.S. troops in Iraq after the "drawdown" (huh?).

And Bush's friend, Prince Bandar of the House of Saud (whose country generously supplied 15 of the 19 terrorists responsible for the September 11th attacks on the U.S.), has been doing some stenchful deals for military might with U.K. companies, and threatening the UK with terrorist attacks if they investigate bribes that were paid to him.


The Boston Globe tells us that the Saudi government provided the September 11th terrorists with financial and logistics support in their quest to destroy the Twin Towers. While the New Yorker (Seymour Hersh, the most trusted name in news) tells us that the Saudi government has given a great deal of financial support to Osama bin Laden and al Qaeda. Why is the Bush family personal friends with these people? Isn't it treason to befriend people who carry out or finance a military attack on your country?

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