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Saturday, May 31, 2008


This week's amusing tidbit comes from none other than U.S. Defence Secretary Robert Gates, the pathetic pawn of a misadministration that has botched everything it touched, domestic and foreign.

According to Bob (let's call him Bob, he forfeited any claim to dignity when he decided to work for this bunch of incompetent clowns), Preznitwit Gee Dumbya (also known as Stupie McPoopyhead, or Commander Codpiece, among other fond noms-de-smackdown) "will leave a "strong and positive legacy" in Asian security."

This remark was made to an apparently impassive crowd at a forum of defence and military officials and security experts known as the Shangri-La Dialogue. To their credit, none of his listeners laughed out loud (LOL'd).

Mr. Gates, it would appear, is not, however, completely impervious to reality. He added (in shame, no doubt):
[...] regardless of controversies over the Bush administration's security policies globally, "actually here in Asia the overall legacy is a pretty straightforward and very positive one."

[...] there was a "significant improvement" in the US-Japanese and US-Indian relationship under Bush.
News to us. Last we heard, when the foo' went to India to address the beneficiaries of his global security policies, the Lok Sabha threatened to pelt him with rotten fruit if he was permitted to speak in the Lower House of the Indian Parliament. As a result, the lickspittles who arranged his visit decided he should speak at the Lal Qila (Red Fort) instead. However, given his reignition of the Crusades and the largely Muslim population of the surrounding area, his security detail were forced to decline the honour and press for an alternative venue. It is our understanding that he ended up giving his speech in the zoo, where his literally captive audience were prevented from flinging souvenirs of their appreciation at him by the majority's lack of proper hands.

As for Japan, it would appear that the Japanese are less open in their sentiment. Perhaps having the current idiot's father puke all over them was a sufficient, if symbolic, warning.

In other, related news, Dr. Zebra, in his analysis of the Preznitwit's health, points out that the Chimperor suffered a syncope:
On January 13, 2002, Bush lost consciousness while sitting on a couch in the White House, watching a football game. His head hit the floor, resulting in an abrasion on his left cheekbone and a small bruise on his lower lip. The incident was blamed on a combination of (a) Bush not feeling well in previous days, and (b) an improperly eaten pretzel. Their combined effect was to slow the President's heart. (The description suggests a vaso-vagal attack.) The period of unconsciousness was brief [28].
Additional information from an article in eMedicine states:
Syncope is defined as a transient self-limited loss of consciousness, usually leading to a fall. It is a subset of a broader range of conditions causing transient loss of consciousness. Syncope is a common medical problem accounting for up to 1% of emergency department visits and is the sixth leading cause of hospitalization for people older than 65 years.

Syncope results from a self-terminating inadequacy of global cerebral nutrient perfusion.
The Idiot-in-Chief has had several falls, starting from the first when he lost a struggle with a pretzel. Doubtless "inadequacy of global cerebral nutrient" is quite believable as an ongoing condition for the Chimperor.

Hope that makes YOUR weekend happy, people!

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