Politics: Schadenfreude

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Warning: If you think we cuss and swear a lot, you ain't seen nothin' yet. So exercise a little caution if you're planning to visit Inspector Lohmann.

For years, we've had to endure the GOP's endless yawping about how Democrats want to raise taxes, they're tax and spenders, they are throwing away the nation's money, looting the treasury, blah blah blah ad infinitum ad nauseam.

Of course, the past seven years has shown us that the GOP shill in the White House, combined with the GOP rubber-stampers in Congress, have managed to blow away the trillion dollar surplus the Clinton Administration left us, and burn through several trillion more, so that now we are facing the largest amount of national debt ever, combined with negative economic growth and inadequate job growth and collapse of the industrial and manufacturing infrastructure, combined with a devaluing dollar, and collapsing national infrastructure. The GOP hasn't raised taxes on us, but they've managed to raise the price of everything, from gas to food &mdash everything except housing, that is, so that more people now own less equity in their houses than any time since World War II. That's right. You have to go back 60 years to find a time when homeowners were worse off.

Congratulations, Chimpy McDumbass.

In the midst of all this terrible news, it's kind of refreshing to hear that the GOP has not escaped unscathed from all the troubles they started.

The NYT tells us:

Hundreds of thousands of dollars are missing and presumed stolen from the chief fund-raising arm of House Republicans, according to party officials who described the findings of emergency internal audits.

The financial records of the group, the National Republican Congressional Committee, may also have been falsified for several years, Republican officials said. The campaign committees of several Republican lawmakers may also have been victims of a scam that is now under criminal investigation by the F.B.I.

The audits were ordered after the abrupt departure several weeks ago of Christopher J. Ward, who had been treasurer of the committee. Lawmakers said that Mr. Ward, who served a similar role for dozens of individual members of Congress and their political committees, is the focus of the F.B.I.’s criminal investigation.

The committee has acknowledged publicly that it was aware of “irregularities in our financial audit process” and that it had called in the F.B.I. in February because “these irregularities may include fraud.”

But until now the committee has not acknowledged that any money was missing from its bank accounts or that the financial irregularities might extend beyond the national committee to the campaign funds of individual Republican lawmakers who also worked with Mr. Ward, a longtime party operative.

BWAHAHAHAHA! Oh, sorry. We don't mean to take so much joy in the pain of others &mdash no, wait, we do. Because these are the selfsame crooks, thugs, and liars who kept telling us, as they cut taxes for themselves and their wealthy friends and tried to convince poor, working class, and middle-class Americans that it was imperative to repeal estate taxes to keep Paris Hilton in designer handbags, that we should "take personal responsibility" for the fucked-up economy, the mass offshoring of our jobs, the rising cost of school loans, the rising cost of health insurance, the rising cost of food, the rising cost of housing. Yes, these schmucks who encouraged a "I got mine, and fuck you all very much" mentality for the past decade, these putzes who wanted to "shrink government," that is, social programs that feed poor schoolchildren and help retirees find adequate health care and suitable housing, and give poor women prenatal care so they can birth and raise healthy children, they wanted to "drown [those programs] like a baby in the bathtub."

How does it feel now that the shoe is on the other foot, folks? You don't believe in big government, right. Hey, you believe in no government. Grover Norquist, your reigning queen, thinks people don't need government. So why the hell are you calling in the FBI? Why don't you guys take some personal responsibility for first, encouraging this greedy mentality, and then hiring people who live by it?


Take your situational ethics and cram them, GOP. Right up alongside your head. Yes. In your ass.

As for our good fellow-citizens who contributed to the GOP? Hope you're happy now that your money (which is devaluing hourly) has basically just sprouted wings and flown away. See if you can find out how Mr. Ward spent it. Oysters and champagne? Prostitutes? Luxury automobiles? Trips to exotic destinations? Don't cry too hard over it, though. Just don't give the bastards another red cent, or you'll be living in a refrigerator box out by the local dump, and eating cat food if you're lucky.

Update: More here.

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