Women's Rights: Domestic Violence Is Really OK

As long as it's your wife, girlfriend, or some other female you're beating up. That's the message corporate America wants you to remember. Do drugs? They'll bust your ass. Have sex with people of your own gender? They'll bust your ass. Be cruel to animals? They'll bust your ass (and rightly so, for once).

But choking or beating your wife, mistress, girlfriend, lover (as long as they're female), even a casual acquaintance - that's just fine. You might have to say you're sorry in public, and do a little rehabracadabra. Blame the booze or drugs or stress of your high-flyin' job. Wait a few months, and then corporate America will sneak you in through the side door, and it's back to a life of ten-thousand-dollar martinis and private jets and the penthouse suite office.

Just look at Chris Albrecht. Back in May, I predicted that his arrest for beating up his girlfriend would not have any serious consequences for him.

Sure enough, he called rehabracadabra, blamed the booze, "dried out" in style, and now he's back* in a cushy job:

Chris Albrecht, the former chief executive of HBO who helped develop hits like “The Sopranos” and “Sex and the City,” is planning to join IMG, the talent agency that has been quietly building an international broadcasting business, as the head of its global media unit.

Sarah Jessica Parker, who starred in “Sex and the City,” said she would not hesitate to work with Chris Albrecht again.

Mr. Albrecht is also planning to start an investment fund with IMG’s owner, Theodore J. Forstmann, the colorful financier who has owned everything from the aircraft maker Gulfstream to Dr Pepper, to back media and entertainment projects.

Sarah Jessica Parker is an airhead, but probably smart enough to know where the money is. Just don't date the guy, SJ.

As for my contention that domestic violence is an issue that breaks down along class lines, consider this: men beat up their wives and girfriends every day all over the world. If they're poor or working class, their ass goes to JAIL, not to a posh rehab clinic. And they sure as hell don't get to start investment funds with rich financiers when they get out. Chances are, they might not even get hired, with a criminal record. Different rules for the rich, though.

Congratulations, Mr. Albrecht, you sleazebag. Try not to choke any other women any time soon, OK?

Cobag.

*The link takes you to the NYT, which requires registration.

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