LGBTQ: Looks Like We're Not The Only Ones

NOT GAY!!!

Protestant minister Marcos Zapata of Spain is holding seminars in Galicia to "cure" homosexuals, says the Guardian.

Is that like the Richard Cohen school of ex-gaydom, like, "We can make you 'straight' so you can still hang out with lots of men and touch lots of men but have a wife and kids?" Let's see what Fr. Zapata has to say.

... Zapata likened homosexuality to alcoholism and called it an illness, but said healing was possible through family therapy. In his family, he said, he reinforces masculine roles by watching professional wrestling with his two sons. Zapata also advised the audience to "hug your sons as much as you can, because if you don't, perhaps another man will".

Watching professional wrestling? With all those guys dressed in skin-tight clothing and major makeup that just screams "I am so not fucking gay, you sissymary!"? Oh, yeah, that'll make a person straight.

About as straight as Ted Haggard. No, he's straight now, reeelly.

The "hugging your sons" bit? Dunno. Homosexuals are not the same thing as pedophiles, but if you're an adult male fighting off libidinous desires for some hunky young dude, and you start in on hugging your adolescent sons, uh ... not that you'd have sexual desire for them, necessarily, but you want to keep away from temptation, not sport a woody (thereby leading to lots of embarrassing questions) while embracing it. It's probably OK when they're really young, but what happens when they're at the height of their adolescent beauty?

And before anyone starts casting stones, consider that teenage girls are what defines the height of desireability for the slack-jawed male masses, in this culture. Why should things be any different for homosexuals than heterosexuals? Would you want straight fathers hugging their adolescent daughters? Isn't that what creeps most people out about those Purity Ball thingies, men dancing with their adolescent daughters as they would dance with their wives or lovers?

At any rate, the Galician regional government is about to investigate Fr. Zapata to ensure he's not promoting homophobia, and Spanish gay/lesbian organizations plan to sue him.

Pity there's no therapists offering a cure for homophobia.

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