Entertainment: Stupid People

The thing about pain is, it makes you want to pick on others. OK, let's rephrase that. It makes me want to pick on others. Which is why all our good friends know to either make us get some really strong pain meds or give us a wide berth when we're in pain.

But hey, don't blame us, man. The world is full of truly stupid people who daily beg and beg us to pick on them mercilessly.

Here, for example, we offer you today's (deserving, we might add) victim.

Heidi Dalibor

This young woman decided she was not going to return two library books. In her own words:

“I said, what could they possibly do? They can’t arrest me for this… I was wrong,” Dalibor said.

Mind you, the library extended her every courtesy, sending her repeated notices, calling her on the telephone, and writing her several letters. Nevertheless, Miss Genius Mugshot here decided she could blow off the library (and its many patrons, and the taxpayers who fund it and keep it going) and didn't bother to respond.

So they turned her case over to the cops. But, has she learned her lesson? Hell, no. That would require something by way of a brain, which this chiquita simply does not possess. She got slapped with a $170 fine, and she thinks this means the books have been paid for. No, honey. That fine just paid the court's expenses, and possibly the PD's for having to deal with your stupidity. The library is still out two books and the cost of the time that was required to follow up with you and the police on the matter.

This woman's selfishness is simply unbelievable, but at least it's dwarfed by her sheer stupidity. People, if ever you want a book for your very own, to keep for all time? Go to your local bookstore, or get on Amazon, or Bores and Ignoble, and pay list price, you know, somewhere between $7 and $25 for both. Or, better yet, borrow a copy from your friends (and return it promptly, or you'll soon be out a couple friends) if you simply must read it right away, and then pick up a second-hand copy for a couple of bucks. There is no earthly need to pay $170 for a pair of novels.

Do not, not, not, earn yourself a criminal record while simultaneously irritating the holy living shit out of your fellow library patrons by simply stealing the fucking book, you know? Did your parents raise you to be a thief? No? You did it all by yourself? Fer cryin' out loud, people pay taxes so that the library can stock all the books the unmonied classes might want to read (we can't all be John McCain and own seven houses and spend $500 on a pair of shoes, after all). So out of basic common human decency, return the goddamn books when you're done reading them. So other people can read them too. That's why they're in the library. Idiota.

Wonder if chiquita realizes that her little brush with the law is going to show in her records for at least a few years?

Stumble It!